Thread: Limericks!

OK, since Rtyom gave back the Rhymes thread, let's start our own limerick thread.

Remember, the rhyme scheme is A-A-B-B-A, five lines, and meter is like this:
di-DA-di-di-DA-di-di-DA (2x)
di-DA-di-di-DA (2x)
di-DA-di-di-DA-di-di-DA

The number of syllables can be flexible as long as the meter is correct.

Here's one for Rtyom:

There was a young man named Artem,
Who never could find his way home,
He jiggled his wattle,
And finished the bottle,
And said, what am I some kind of drone?


See, they don't have to be filthy

Who's next?

A savage young man Artie-Smartie
Got mad with a host of a party
He tore him apart,
And ate out his heart,
And said, “gee, this guy was so hearty”

A guy who is known as Artyom
Has fallen onto his dome.
And when he got up
His skull went apart...
And no one has heard of his moan!

There once was a place called MasterRussian
Anybody came, even a Prussian!
Kwatts is gone
Dobry is now a pawn
Olya's left, but she already knows Russian!