Укажите на ошибки в письме

**VladimirZavidovich** · June 28th, 2009, 05:46 PM

Здравствуйте

Пишу очень важное для меня письмо человеку в США. Пожалуйста, прочитайте и внесите корректировки. Напишите здесь или мне на ящик: vladimirzavidovich@gmail.com. Заранее спасибо.
Ниже под письмом - первоначальная версия на русском.

Hello!
Dear ХХХ, it was so exciting to read your message!

I have already collected most of materials to apply. Unfortunately, I`ll be able to send the letter to NY only on Tuesday (30th of June), because the Constitution Day (which happened to be today) and the day after are the days-off. By the way, I have some questions about the registration procedure, and I hope You can answer them.

1. Announcement says: mail via Ukrainian post office only. In such way my letter is going to reach NY is 10 days or faster. Isn`t it too long? May I use the faster way and mail through express delivery (DHL or Fedex)?
2. Is the recommendation from a friend supposed to be written in the same form, like the one from a teacher? May it be written in a free form?
3. Speaking about life experiences: would I just list them, or it`s necessary to send letters of commendation (copies)?
4. Am I supposed to send copies of school certificates, or the official fully legible four-year school transcript will be enough?
5. I have to give an empty envelope to teacher writing a recommendation. Does it mean, that this application must be mailed separately from the rest of the materials?

I`m sorry for writing such a bulky letter. But I do hope to read Your answer.
Best regards, Vladimir.

P.S. Writing 3 letters in 3 languages. Choose the one you like.

Здравствуйте, ХХХ!
Ваш ответ на мое письмо вызвал во мне бурю эмоций, перешедших в желание немедленно действовать.

Большинство необходимого для регистрации материала уже собрал, но, к сожалению, по не зависящим от меня причинам (выходные+день Конституции => не работает почта) смогу отправить письмо лишь во вторник (30.06). Кроме того, у меня возник ряд вопросов, на которые Вы, надеюсь, сможете дать мне ответы.
1. Указано, что можно пользоваться лишь государственной почтовой службой. Меня заверили, что таким образом мое письмо дойдет до США в течение 10 дней. Успею ли я до тестирования, учитывая такие сроки? Нельзя ли воспользоваться услугами спешной почты (частной)?
2. Характеристика от друга должна быть написана в той же форме, что и от учителя? Или возможен вариант свободного написания (в форме письма)?
3. Касательно жизненных достижений: нужно лишь перечислить? Или необходимо с письмом послать копии грамот?
4. Нужно ли посылать копии аттестатов? Или достаточно официального школьного транскрипта?
5. Указано, что пишущему характеристику учителю нужно дать пустой конверт. Значит ли это, что эту характеристику нужно отправлять отдельно от всех документов?

Простите, если написал слишком много, но я искренне надеюсь, что Вы мне ответите.
С уважением, Владимир.
P.S. Не знаю, на каком языке желательно обращаться. Пишу 3 варианта, выберите удобный для Вас.

**rockzmom** · June 29th, 2009, 12:24 AM

Hi Vladimir,

Please note that I do not read or speak any Russian. So I took your English version.

I also do not know if you are sending this to a person via email, fax or regular mail, so the format would be a little different for each.

I would also add any identifcation number that they may have assigned to you so that they can easily match your name and letter to your file.

I added a few other questions that I thought you might need to know the answer to. If you already know them, just delete.

Here are some links about writing business letters:
http://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/653/02/
http://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/653/01/

Good luck and if you have any questions you can ask me here or send me a PM. Rockzmom.

If by regular mail, the format would be:

Vladimir Zavidovich
Your Address
Your City and Postal code
Your Country
vladimirzavidovich@gmail.com
ID# xxxxxx

Date

Person's First and Last Name
Street Address
City, State Zip Code
USA

Dear Mr. or Ms. XXX:

Example:
Vladimir Zavidovich
Your Address
Your City and Postal code
Your Country
vladimirzavidovich@gmail.com
ID# xxxxxx

June 30, 2009

Ernie English
1234 Writing Lab Lane
Write City, IN 12345

Dear Mr. English:

If by email the format would be:

Dear Mr. or Ms. XXX:

If by Fax:
Vladimir Zavidovich
Your Address
Your City and Postal code
Your Country
vladimirzavidovich@gmail.com
ID# xxxxxx

Date

Person's First and Last Name
Street Address
City, State Zip Code
USA

(this should be in the center of the page) SENT VIA FACSIMILIE

Dear Mr. or Ms. XXX:

Example:

Vladimir Zavidovich
Your Address
Your City and Postal code
Your Country
vladimirzavidovich@gmail.com
ID# xxxxxx

June 30, 2009

Ernie English
1234 Writing Lab Lane
Write City, IN 12345

(this should be in the center of the page) SENT VIA FACSIMILIE

Dear Mr. English:

-------
(here is the body of the letter that I have rewritten for you)

It was very exciting to receive your message and application instructions!

I have already collected most of materials requested for the application to apply for xxx. I should be able to send the package to you by XXX. This date is due to the fact that we are currently celebrating our Constitution Day Holiday and many places are closed for the holiday and the next few days thereafter.

Additionally, I have some questions about the registration procedures, and I hope you will be able to clarify them for me.

1. The instructions state that the package should be mailed via Ukrainian post office only. If this is to be done in such a manner, my package to you will take approximately ten business days to reach you in New York. Is that going to be too long of a time period? May I use a faster way and mail the package via an express delivery service such as DHL or FedEx?

2. Is the letter of recommendation from a friend supposed to be written in the same format as those as the ones of my professors? May it be written in a free form style?

3. When describing my life experiences, should I just list them and provide details, or is it necessary to send letters of commendation or recommendation as well?

4. Do you require complete officially sealed four-year college or university transcripts? Do you need these to be translated into English as well? Or will an unofficial copy and/or copies of my certificates and/or diplomas be sufficient?

5. I have provided envelopes to my professors who are writing my letters of recommendations. Should these be mailed to you under separate cover directly from the professors or as long as they are sealed, may they be included in the package that I will be sending to you? If I have not received all of the letters of recommendation back by the time that I am mailing the package, is it possible for me (or the professors) to scan the letter and email it to you?

I believe these are all the questions that I have at this time and if I find I have any others I will contact you as soon as possible. Thank you for your prompt attention to this matter and I look forward to your responses.

With kind regards,

Vladimir Zavidovich
vladimirzavidovich@gmail.com
ID# xxxxxx

**paulb** · June 29th, 2009, 02:44 AM