Russian English
Встретились два кума*, один у другого спрашивает:
- Ты на Майдан ездил?
-Да нет, как же я покину шахту, вода скамью затопит, потом не откачаешь. А ты ездил?
-Тоже нет, ты же знаешь, я металлург, печь затухнет, тогда хоть новую строй. А Николай, наверное, был?
-Да какое там, разве он своих буренок покинет, ведь он фермер.
-А Иван Петрович?
-Да он же учитель, кто же детишек учить будет?
-А Василий Васильевич?
-Да он же врач – больных не бросишь.
-Куме**, а какая же СКОТИНА УЖЕ ТРИ МЕСЯЦА стоит на площади и говорит от имени народа?		 Two friends speaking, one asks another:

- Have you been to Maidan?
- No way, if I leave the mine it will go submerged, I'll never get it dry after that. What about you?
- Me neither, I'm metallurgist, if my oven goes cold it'll be as good as ruined. Maybe Nicolay was there?

- Tell me about it, like he would abandon his cattle, you know that he's a farmer.
- And Ivan Petrovich?
- He's a teacher, who'll teach kids if not him?
- Vasiliy Vasil'evich?
- He's a doctor - he can't abandon his patients.
- My friend, then who are those FAGGOTS standing on the town square FOR THREE MONTHS ALREADY and speaking in the name of the people?
* The word "кум" means "friend". This word is rarely used in modern Russian language and usually shows the presence of Ukrainian context. Note that the related word "кумовство" doesn't mean "friendship" but rather means "corruption".
** The word "куме" is "кум" used in vocative case. This case is not learned or used systematically, but still exist in the form of exceptions.