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Thread: official language

  1. #1
    Administrator MasterAdmin's Avatar
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    official language

    European Commission has just announced an agreement
    whereby English will be the official language of the
    European Union rather than German, which was the other
    possibility. As part of the negotiations, the British
    Government conceded that English spelling had some
    room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year
    phase-in plan that would become known as
    "Euro-English".

    In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c".
    Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with
    joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k".
    This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have
    one less letter.

    There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond
    year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with
    "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.

    In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling
    kan be expekted to reach the stage where more
    komplikated changes are possible. Governments will
    enkourage the removal of double letters which have
    always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil
    agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the
    languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

    By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as
    replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v". During ze
    fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords
    kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a
    reil sensi bl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or
    difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand
    ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.

    Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German
    like zey vunted in ze forst plas.

    If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl
    ~ Мастерадминов Мастерадмин Мастерадминович ~

  2. #2
    Завсегдатай
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    Я это уже давно постил.
    «И всё, что сейчас происходит внутре — тоже является частью вселенной».

  3. #3
    Завсегдатай Scorpio's Avatar
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    Вообще-то, это давным-давно придумал Марк Твен.
    Кр. -- сестр. тал.

  4. #4
    Почтенный гражданин
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    А вот я это в первый раз прочитал. Забавно.
    У Марка Твена, наверно, речь не про Евросоюз была? Тогда это "творческая переработка". :P

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