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Thread: S. Lukyanenko. The Dreamline . Proofreaders are welcome )))

  1. #121
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    Re: Please check my translation.

    Ships are also called vessels in English, a small group of ships or space vessels is called a squadron, and a large group of ships is called a fleet. This is true for both air and sea groups, and I believe this also bears true with science fiction space units. Star Trek calls the enterprise a spaceship, and I have heard them refer to a large group of spaceships as a fleet.

    thanx

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    Re: Please check my translation.

    I saw what you've suggested about bony pieces. The general idea it to express the intentional awkwardness of the phrase in the original text:

    Затем позволяется доесть остатки, не пренебрегая костистыми кусками...
    Кертис послушно встал за спиной Кея. Ему было хорошо. Он даже готов
    был не пренебречь костистыми кусками.


    Kay was mocking Arthur and quoted some homily for the young people of Maretta
    And Arthur felt so good that he was even going to play along.

    About 'dung'
    It's something like 'The Army's going to eat us for breakfast' (for the things we've done) but ruder.
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  3. #123
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    Re: Please check my translation.

    The Army will have our a$$ on a platter. (is that crude enough?)

    And Arthur felt so good that he was even going to play along.
    rule of thumb...Don't start a sentence with the word and, either lose it or add a comma to the preceding sentence instead of a period.

    I forgot rule of thumb is something that is an established rule or law. it comes from the Old English idea that you shouldn't beat your wife with a stick thicker than your thumb. rule of thumb

  4. #124
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    Re: Please check my translation.

    chap 11

    The whole house was made out of wood – all three storeys of it.
    msp, should be stories

    Any man of Terran origin would be amazed at that but Arthur Curtis had seen even greater a luxury.
    Any man of Terran origin would be amazed at that, but Arthur Curtis had seen more luxurious homes than this.

    He came down to the ground floor into the roomy hall.
    He climbed down the stairs to the ground floor and walked into the spacious hall.

    There were nobody there, the Henriette’s husband, apparently, was very enthusiastic about his work… or the company that gathered in the climate control facility
    There were nobody there. Henriette’s husband apparently was very enthusiastic about his work, or the company that gathered in the climate control facility.

    One wide and low armchair was occupied by a dozing black cat.
    A dozing black cat occupied one wide and low armchair.

    In reply to Arthur’s quiet ‘pss, pss, pss kitty’ it rewarded Arthur with only a contemptuous gaze.
    Arthur awoke the cat, quietly whispering ‘pss, pss, pss kitty’, only to be rewarded with a contemptuous gaze.
    Remember, the cat was dozing so how could it gaze at you?

    Only the latest issue of the ‘Imperial military digest’ that was looking out from under ‘The Gossiper’ was falling out of the grand picture
    Only the latest issue of the ‘Imperial Military Digest’, that was looking out from under ‘The Gossiper’, looked out of place in the grand picture.

    Arthur wanted to browse through the magazine but he felt shy of this desire for some reason.
    Arthur wanted to browse through the magazine but felt awkward about it for some reason he did not understand.

    He judged that he would certainly have the time for it later.
    He decided that he would certainly have the time to satisfy his curiosity later.

    He judged that he would certainly have the time for it later. Arthur opened the door (unlocked!) and exited the house.
    And in the next moment he was in the middle of an infinite garden.
    Arthur tried the front door's handle and found it unlocked, discovering his exit was an entrance to a very large garden.
    infinite means without end or measure, a garden would not be infinite.

    It had a soft climate, fertile soil, numerous calm rivers and small lakes, and two not very big oceans.
    It had a mild climate, fertile soil, numerous calm rivers and small lakes and two small oceans.

    Now I thought I would discuss the last comma I removed. In writing, when you have several items in one sentence separated by commas, the last segment beginning with and, is called an Oxford comma.
    example... I have given you my horse, cows, pig, and now my money.
    the comma after pig is unnecessary. (I had an author friend teach me about that. i took my manuscript apart and removed them all)

    The planet was colonized shortly after the Feud War by hundreds of millions discharged veterans.
    The planet was colonized shortly after the Feud War by hundreds of millions of discharged veterans.
    no world participated so little in the empire-wide projects and paid taxes this small.
    no world participated so little in the empire-wide projects and paid lower taxes.

    Arthur walked along the path that was paved with stones by the flower-beds with unfamiliar flowers and looked over at the house.
    Arthur walked along the path that was paved with stones by the flowerbeds with unfamiliar flowers and looked over at the house.

    There were no sounds except slight rustling of leaves.
    There were no sounds except the slight rustling of leaves.

    It sooner expressed some envy of adventure that fell on him so he didn’t argue.
    She seemed to be in envy of his adventure, so he didn't argue.

    Then having made up her mind she tossed her fringe,
    Then having made up her mind she tossed her bangs,
    ('fringe' is correct, of course, but it is one of the latest hairstyles and I believe only fashion conscious women who understand what you are saying. Men would go huh?) Keep in mind, very few women read military oriented science fiction, and fringe is a type of bangs.
    He wasn’t afraid of a probable trap – the girl didn’t look dangerous and Kay was quite sure in his safety too.
    He wasn’t afraid of a probable trap – the girl didn’t look dangerous and Kay was quite sure he was safe, too.

    Arthur simply had a formidable experience of excursions with his female coevals.
    Arthur simply had some clumsy past experiences of excursions with his female coevals.
    (I think this is what you mean, I didn't use awkward in this sentence, because you use it in the next)

    Usually he had to listen to a boring nonsense about local points of interest and, not too infrequently, to answer an awkward and slobbery kiss.
    Usually he had to listen to some boring nonsense about local points of interest and not too infrequently, to answer with an awkward and slobbery kiss.

    Rachel led him finding her way by some sixth sense. In a couple of minutes all directions disappeared for Arthur.
    Rachel led him finding her way by some sort of sixth sense. In a couple of minutes Arthur lost all sense of direction.

    All that remained was the blue sky above his head like on Terra, the equally spaced trees and the ground which was soft due to leaves that had been falling on it for centuries.
    . All that remained was the blue sky above his head, which reminded him of Terra. The equally spaced trees and the ground he was standing on was soft, due to the decaying leaves that had been falling on it for centuries.

    And there was silence, silence from everywhere, even rustling of the grass under his feet was sharp to his ear.
    The silence was so thick, he could hear his heartbeat; even the rustling of the grass under his feet sounded loud to his ear.
    “Did they permit you to pluck the fruits?”
    “Did they permit you to pick the fruits?”
    Pluck may be correct meaning, but in English it is more natural sounding to pick the fruit.

    “Pluck me an apple. That yellow one.”
    same

    Arthur jumped up bending down the twig, broke the flexible stalk and silently handed the apple to the girl.
    Arthur jumped up, and bending down the twig, broke the flexible stalk and silently handed the apple to the girl.

    “It is not customary to pluck anything without permission in other’s gardens.”
    “It is not customary to pick anything without permission in other people's gardens.”

    Rachel informed ignoring his tone.
    Rachel informed him, ignoring his tone.

    “I wanted to swim.” she said, “but I can’t swim alone.
    “I wanted to swim,” she said, “but I can’t swim alone.

    It finally came to Arthur what was that disk that hung on the girl’s shoulder.
    Arthur finally realized what the disk that hung on the girl’s shoulder was.

    If a button on a handle was pressed an invisible and ultra-strong force field pulled a man towards it.
    If a button on a handle was pressed, an invisible and ultra-strong force field pulled a man towards it.

    "I do.” admitted Arthur gloomily.
    "I do,” admitted Arthur gloomily.

    Descendants of the Feud War heroes must have degenerated pretty well if they didn’t swim without a ‘leash’ on their cozy planet.
    Descendants of the Feud War heroes must have become soft, if they didn’t swim without a ‘leash’ on their cozy planet.

    “Don’t let me down.” Rachel said seriously, taking off her t-shirt on the move
    “Don’t let me down," Rachel said seriously, taking off her t-shirt on the move.
    They came onto the river and Arthur froze.
    They came to the river and Arthur froze.

    Thirty feet below them, spreading icy chill around, there raged a swirling and seething flow.
    Thirty feet below them, there raged a swirling and seething flow spreading its icy chill.

    “There’s little water today.” Rachel said with concern,
    “There’s little water today,” Rachel said with concern.

    Other channels appeared from below the ground fifty yards away around that point resembling blue spokes of a huge wheel.
    Other channels appeared from below the ground fifty yards away from that point, resembling blue spokes of a huge wheel.

    The channels stretched far to disappear in the gardens.
    The channels stretched far, disappearing into the gardens.

    “Attach the carbine” Rachel asked turning her back on him.
    “Attach the carbine” Rachel asked, turning her back on him.

    Arthur pulled the tie “Are you sure it will hold?”
    Arthur pulled the tie. “Are you sure it will hold?”
    I’ll try to make it to the shoal, but if I get into the whirlpool then activate it.
    I’ll try to make it to the shoal, but if I get into the whirlpool, then activate it.

    … Rachel had gotten completely dry by the time Arthur carefully descended down the concrete plates.
    Rachel was completely dry by the time Arthur carefully descended down the concrete plates.

    “I haven’t gotten around into getting acquainted with him yet."
    “I haven’t gotten around to getting acquainted with him yet.
    “I could borrow you my
    “I could loan you my

    Finally they decided that the belt from his jeans, if goodly tightened on his chest, would hold the pulling of the ‘leash’.
    Finally they decided that the belt from his jeans, if securely tightened on his chest, would hold his weight when the 'leash' was pulled.

    “Will you bag some rays?” she asked.
    I can only guess what you mean. Does bag some rays mean something about getting some sun exposure? If it does, perhaps, Will you get a tan?
    would work

  5. #125
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    Re: Please check my translation.

    9

    Kahl idly stretched herself and pulled the blanket over. Then she looked mockingly at Nomachi.
    “You are out of your mind.” he said.
    “My, my…” Isabelle smacked he lips, “Emotions... from you, my reserved friend?”
    “Kahl, the army will have our ass on a platter. You finished off the troopers… dear gods, they all have the aThan… and we go into Lemach’s lair after that?
    “Now he will take us more seriously. I talked to him and he agreed to wait for explanations.”
    “What explanations? Whatever for? We’ve got Curtis’s son! Let’s head to Terra, to Endoria, to any large center…” Luis rose from the bed and walked down the cabin. Kahl made a face, but he didn’t notice her reaction on his nakedness. Let’s report everything, deliver the boy and they will take us out of trouble… Kahl, you have a right to report directly to the Emperor! This is even better! We’re not going to remain without medals.”
    “Stick that medal into your fat ass,” Kahl said, “or put on some clothes at least. A title of deputy commander on some wild planet is all you have been dreaming of?”
    “Well, yes, for the time being!” Luis proudly raised his chin and reached for his clothing. “Afterwards, we’ll see.”
    “You’re a fool!” Kahl sat on a bed. “The emperor is on good terms with Curtis, forcedly of course. He wouldn’t risk everything. Still, if we break the boy ourselves, if aThan becomes a government’s monopoly then what would remain of Curtis senior? Zero.”
    “Why do we need Lemach?” Nomachi exclaimed hysterically.
    “The boy endured the ‘Three A’ class interrogation without making a sound. The truth serum decomposed in his blood in four seconds, the neural suppression caused him simply to fall asleep. We can only kill him, but nothing more.”
    “And Lemach?”
    “The army has its own laboratories, its own espionage and interrogation school. Together we might be able to break the boy. It’s better to share the rewards between the three of us than penal servitude between you and me.”
    Nomachi sniffed resembling a fat and nasty kid. Then he inquired:
    “Why three of us? Marjan, T/san…”
    “They are pawns. They’re going to get either promotion or reprimand. We are the only ones who takes risk, Luis, only we! But we will be the first to skim the cream off also.
    Nomachi nodded doubtfully.
    “Well, we’ll risk it. Once we started.”
    Kahl suppressed the urge to break her lover’s neck. It carried too little of value anyway.

    Arthur woke up when Kahl entered his cell.
    “Hi,” the woman said, “you don’t look bad.”
    Curtis junior made no reply.
    “You are well prepared,” Kahl continued. “You ignore pain, some strange things happen to drugs in your blood. Is it some kind of immunity that had been introduced even before the aThan?”
    Arthur didn’t answer. It weren’t narcoprotectors since they could inhibit the tissue growth in a child’s organism. Instead, symbiont bacteria circulated in his blood that gladly consumed any foreign chemical preparation, even the bioterminator toxin. But Arthur had no intention to share even this little secret of the aThan empire.
    “What are we going to do with you?” Kahl lowered the toilet lid and sat on it, “Maybe you will tell me.”
    The boy closed his eyes.
    “I could permit you to take a shower. You could wash off the blood and relax.”
    “Are there any cameras in the shower?” Arthur answered with a question. “It amused me back on Incedios.”
    Kahl felt spitted over. It was worse, the boy managed to knock her off balance. It took her several second to relax her throat and reply in a calm voice.
    “Of course there are.”
    “Thanks, I’ll think of it. You can play the old tapes meanwhile.”
    Kahl stood up. She wanted to hit the boy, but it was simply absurd after all Marjan had been doing to him.”
    “You will regret it.” she whispered, “We’re going to shake everything out of you… everything…”
    “You’re and old and sick psycho,” Arthur said, “even the mechanist is more human than you.”
    When Mookhamadee saw Kahl, she didn’t require her enhanced sensors to perceive Kahl’s fury.
    “Go to the brat.” Isabelle ordered, “Three B.”
    “It’s pointless,” Marjan said as she was rising from the floor. She had been talking to the meklon who, like an ugly Cerberus, was lying in the corridor near the interrogation chamber, “Request permission to apply ‘Three C’ or go straight to crippling methods.”
    “I make decisions here!” Kahl shouted. “We have another three days to Laan and the intensity should be increased gradually.”
    She didn’t even notice that she was explaining things before the mechanist. Marjan inclined her head.
    “Three B, deputy commander.”
    When women left, Marjan to the boy’s chamber and Kalh to the Luis’s cabin, the meklon said aloud:
    “Why not kill him? The effect would be the same.”
    He burst into cracking laughter. T/san was proud of the fact that he managed to develop a genuine Human sense of humor.
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  6. #126
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    Re: Please check my translation.

    10

    “Was it painful to die?” Tommy asked. Kay cast a sidelong look at him as he continued to drive the car.
    “Haven’t you noticed?”
    The boy continued to screw up his courage. A strange reckless feeling came over him, the same feeling often comes to adults when they face death, but it seldom visits children.
    “I did. You squealed like a wounded gayal, even worse.”
    “Very funny.” Kay agreed, “Your voice would hardly be any louder.”
    The center of Anglobad remained behind. Soon, ugly hovels of the suburbs also disappeared. Time after time they encountered high fences of mansions that stretched along the road that greeted them with warmth of their windows. Tommy looked at them in melancholy. ‘Mizan’ went at full speed sometimes taking over the control so delicately as if it was Kay who managed all the difficulties of the dark and wet road.
    “Rented a house in the suburb?” Tommy asked. Althos didn’t answer and the boy carefully moved a little bit forward.
    “I wouldn’t.” Kay said without turning back, “You have admitted once that you wouldn’t be able to strangle me.”
    The rain continued pouring eliminating the last remnants of the daylight. Tommy huddled on the back seat and looked at the back of Althos’s head. If only he had something heavier than the folder with writing books he would have risked it.
    “I thought you were lying about the aThan.” he confessed suddenly, “It often happens in movies… some bandit spreads rumors that he has the aThan and everybody is afraid of him.”
    “Life is not a movie. It’s far worse, kid.”
    “Anyway, I don’t have any regrets. I avenged Lena. And somebody will avenge me.”
    “Probably.”
    Tommy shivered.
    “Why did you call the police? You don’t like children. And they did tell it on TV that you were a hired killer with sadistic instincts.”
    “They tried to stand for a stupid friend. This deserves respect, doesn’t it? We have arrived, by the way.”
    The car slowed down as it approached a concrete wall. A symbolic height of the fence was compensated by the force field emitters that were installed along the wall. Long rows of hangars stretched behind it. Protection was disabled since it used too much energy when it was raining even in the stand-by mode. Kay stopped the car near the crossing point. The transparent box was shielded even now.
    “I’m going to scream” Tommy said quickly.
    “Go ahead.” Kay agreed and turned on the intercom.
    “You are entering the restricted zone of the Cailis spaceport.” someone’s bored voice said, “What is the purpose of your visit?”
    “Help!” Tommy shouted. Kay ignored it and said:
    “My vessel is on the seventeenth landing pad.”
    “Primary control?”
    “Help, he’s going to kill me!” Tommy shouted again.
    “Domino, thirty, alpha, seven.” Kay dictated.
    “Thank you for using our service.” the guard replied. “Follow the light.”
    “Help… please…” whispered the boy. Kay switched off the intercom and drove the car through the opened gates. Then he said:
    “Cold… rain… no need for an inspection… The car’s intercom is set to recognize my voice only, you fool. It filters other sounds out.”
    The car slowly crawled by the hangars following the orange spotlight. Tommy didn’t say anything.
    “I’ve already contrabanded one guy this way.” Kay informed, “He caused me some big trouble and wounded my client. I’m not a killer, I am a bodyguard. They’re different things… Well, I fixed this guy under the nozzles and took off.”
    The boy made a sobbing sound.
    “Don’t be afraid, your fate is far more interesting.” Kay said.
    Kay dictated another code near the seventeenth hangar, this time to an automat. Wide doors opened and the car drove in. The hangar illuminated.
    “We’re almost home.” Kay said and settled back in his seat. He realized that he missed his hyperboat.
    Hyperboats appeared about ten years ago with the invention of the Reajax drive that didn’t require so much space as did cheaper interphased drives. Kay’s boat had already become somewhat obsolete during the past years but she was a solid model that came down from an Endorian shipyard, one of the best in the Empire. Its living module, a thirty foot oval, was attached to the engine, a sphere of a somewhat lesser diameter, by means of two lattice trusses. The cylinder of the quark reactor was placed between them. Some people painted their hyperboats in their planetary colors or an imperial bicolor. Kay preferred simple colors – gray and black. But they were applied under guidance of an experienced designer so that this peaceful vessel resembled a military ship.
    “Hi, guy…” Kay said as he lowered the window.
    “Hi, stranger.” the ship responded with a low contralto. “You look like my owner.”
    “It’s me.” Kay replied.
    “No kidding?” the voice rose assuming intonations of a quarrelsome wife.
    “No kidding!”
    “Maybe you can also tell me the password?” the ship inquired insinuatingly.
    “Easy meat!”
    “All right, come in, you old tramp.” the boat agreed in a clear lyrical soprano. A landing bridge appeared from the living module.
    Kay opened the door and proudly said:
    “It should sing in ‘Aida’, don’t you think? Its voice was tuned by a former singer… just for love of the game.”
    The boy wasn’t able to appreciate the vocal talents of the hyberboat at the moment. He got out of the car and looked around helplessly. The hangar was empty, only a distribution terminal loomed in one corner. The hoses and cables were carefully rolled but the control panel was illuminated. There must be a telephone there but the handcuffs eliminated all opportunities to get there.
    “Wake up.” Kay said as he headed towards the landing bridge.
    “Should I let the boy in too?” inquired the hyperboat.
    “It appears so…”
    “It’s not like I am looking forward to it very much.” Tommy said in his last seizure of bravery. Kay roared with laughter.
    Compared to the living module of the freighter, the hyperboat was the pinnacle of comfort and coziness, but Tommy, unlike Arthur, couldn’t appreciate that. The cabin could sooner suit an average liner rather than this tiny vessel. There was a soft carpet on the floor, armchairs, cut-glass ware in the dark-wooden cupboard, and a couple of fragile tables. One of them even had faded flowers in a vase.
    “You’ve been away a long time.” informed the ship when Kay cast a disapproving glance at the posy, “By the way, the local news told that you’ve been murdered.”
    “Well, it’s not the first time.” Kay took the posy from the vase and deposited it in a ceramic vessel on the floor. The vessel made a rumbling sound.
    “And they also said that the murderer was a boy about thirteen years old, just the same age as our guest here, as I understand.”
    “If only it wasn’t me who tuned up your logic I would have considered you intelligent.” Kay said.
    “Thank you.” the ship replied drily, having changed its coloratura to baritone.
    Kay looked at Tommy who was standing by the exit and helplessly picking at the handcuffs. Kay sighed and undone its part of the handcuffs. The bracelet on Tommy’s hand clicked and fell down. The boy shivered.
    “What are we going to do with you… little murderer?” Kay asked, “Should I push you slowly into the recycler, stick you under the nozzles, cut you to pieces, expose you under the algopistol beam or simply spank you?”
    Tommy’s lips began to tremble, he began to cry.
    “Oh,” Kay said, disappointed, “Too many oxygen planets for a silicoid…”
    “What… what do you want?”
    “Go to that door, there is a shower there. Wash yourself, I feel sick just looking at you… all dirt and snivel…”
    “Why?”
    “I prefer killing freshly washed children.” Kay said, “Sometimes I even feed them. Go, put your clothes into the cleaning unit, they will be clean in ten minutes.”
    He turned and walked through a door that opened before him into a small cockpit that was illuminated with lights of awakening control panels.
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  7. #127
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    Re: Please check my translation.

    12
    Formally, it was a free zone of space.
    Formerly, this sector of space was a free zone.

    Beyond the Silac star system Terran ships could be attacked by the Silicoids… but their mere presence here wasn’t a hostile act.
    Beyond the Silac star system, Terran ships could be attacked by the Silicoids, but their mere presence here wasn’t a hostile act.

    The Silicoids paid no attention to the unwanted guests as yet.
    So far, the Silicoids paid no attention to the unwanted guests.

    “The armada is regrouping.” reported the captain of the ‘Persecutor’, “They are redirecting ships to different bases… which one should we follow?”
    “The armada is regrouping,” reported the captain of the ‘Persecutor’. “They are redirecting ships to different bases. Which one should we follow?”

    “Are there all of them here?” Kahl asked.
    what are they referring to as 'all of them' can't fix the grammar if I don't know who all of them is.

    the captain started to lose his temper.
    The captain started to lose his temper.

    What could she do if no communications were possible in the hyperspace?!
    What could she do if no communications were possible in hyperspace?

    Let the time had been lost!
    Unsure what is being said here. Possible correction...
    Too much time had already been lost.

    She will catch him… the boy that knows too much
    .
    She will catch him… that boy knows too much.

    Neither her subordinates nor the troopers showed any surprise when the three ships had entered the hyperspace again
    .
    Neither her subordinates nor the troopers showed any surprise when the three ships had entered hyperspace again.

    They were beginning getting used to the pursuit for the sake of pursuit itself.
    This is not really wrong, but try this...
    They were beginning getting used to the chase for the thrill of the chase itself.

    Kay came to the house whistling out of tune a melody which only a native of Shedar the Second would recognize.
    Kay came to the house whistling a tune which only a native of Shedar the Second would recognize.

    He usually remembered his homeworld only in big trouble.
    Not sure what you mean here. Do you mean that he only remembered his home world when he was in big trouble, or he remembered his home word when it was in big trouble? home world is two words

  8. #128
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    Re: Please check my translation.

    Quote Originally Posted by kahless
    12
    Formally, it was a free zone of space.
    Formerly, this sector of space was a free zone.
    It's formally... or technically.


    Quote Originally Posted by kahless
    “Are there all of them here?” Kahl asked.
    what are they referring to as 'all of them' can't fix the grammar if I don't know who all of them is.
    All of the ships. They were after the Silicoid armada.


    Quote Originally Posted by kahless
    Let the time had been lost!
    Unsure what is being said here. Possible correction...
    Too much time had already been lost.
    Let = Пусть. She acceted the loss of time, still hoping to catch up with Kay and Arthur.
    Here:
    Ни одним словам она не выразила эмоций. Потеряно время? Пусть.

    Quote Originally Posted by kahless
    She will catch him… the boy that knows too much
    .
    She will catch him… that boy knows too much.
    Hmmm, the original says:
    Она схватит его... мальчика, который знает слишком много.

    Literally:
    She will catch him... the boy that knows too much.

    Quote Originally Posted by kahless
    Kay came to the house whistling out of tune a melody which only a native of Shedar the Second would recognize.
    Kay came to the house whistling a tune which only a native of Shedar the Second would recognize.
    here 'whistling out of tune' = whistling badly (off pitch).

    Quote Originally Posted by kahless
    He usually remembered his homeworld only in big trouble.
    Not sure what you mean here. Do you mean that he only remembered his home world when he was in big trouble, or he remembered his home word when it was in big trouble? home world is two words
    It was a kind of superstition. Any time he remembered his home world it was a sign of trouble coming.
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  9. #129
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    Re: Please check my translation.

    “Are [snt6ygzk]there[/snt6ygzk] all of them here?” Kahl asked.

  10. #130
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    Re: Please check my translation.

    Then...
    He usually remembered his homeworld only in big trouble.
    would best be, "Any time he remembered his home world, big trouble was coming."

    “Are there all of them here?” Kahl asked.
    Are all of them here? I agree with AlexB

    Formally, this sector of space was a free zone.
    I rechecked my dictionary and formally is ok, but for smoothness, try the sentence above.

    Kay came to the house whistling out of tune a melody which only a native of Shedar the Second would recognize.
    Ok, here goes...
    Kay came to the house whistling a melody so badly out of tune, only a native of Shedar the Second would recognize it.

    She will catch him… the boy that knows too much.
    Ok, so if i get the meaning right, She will catch him because she has to, because he knows too much, either damaging information or valuable information.
    If this is so, then for smoothness of grammar.
    She will catch him… that boy knows too much.
    or [i]She will catch him, she has to. That boy knows too much.[/i
    or She will catch him; she had no choice. That boy knows too much.

    She acceted the loss of time, still hoping to catch up with Kay and Arthur.
    She accepted the loss of time, still hoping to catch up with Kay and Arthur.
    This will work.

    He was sitting on the hand-rail
    He was sitting on the handrail

    Tauri could relax people whoever they were be that a fish trader or a co-owner of the aThan empire.
    Tauri could cause people to relax, whoever they were, be that a fish trader or a co-owner of the aThan empire.

    Curtis junior was more a child now than he had been ever before, however Kay Duch almost loved this boy now without even knowing why, but having already realized this feeling.
    Curtis junior was more a child now than he had been ever before, however Kay Duch realized that he almost loved this boy now without even knowing why.
    (Way too many wasted words)

    “Kay did you see their channels?”
    “Kay, did you see their channels?”

    “We’ve got problems kid.”
    “We’ve got problems, kid.”

    “I found a ship in the port… it wasn’t bad and the price was quite acceptable.
    “I found a ship in the port… it wasn’t bad and the price was quite acceptable."

    We spent too much money on Incedios
    as far as I can tell, this is Spanish, a word meaning Fire or Incendiary.
    Let's try this, based on your context....
    We spent too much money on Incidentals.

    We’re far from poverty yet bur we cannot afford buying a ship.”
    We’re far from poverty yet, but we cannot afford buying a ship.”

    Arthur, have you agreed upon such situation with Van Curtis?
    Arthur, have you agreed upon such a situation with Van Curtis?

    . Even if I grow up a beard I would still remain an eternal boy.”
    Even if I grow a beard I would still remain an boy forever.”

    Two of my guides are already having that eternity.”
    Two of my guides are already experiencing that eternal damnation.”
    Many different ways to say that, but I think that one says it best.

    “The easier it would be for you.”
    It would be easier for you.
    “Kay I don’t want you to be tortured.” the boy said seriously.
    “Kay, I don’t want you to be tortured,” the boy said seriously.

    “There is a portal to another space on the planet Graal.”
    “There is a portal to another dimention on the planet Graal.”
    or
    “There is a portal to another sector of space on the planet Graal.”

    Why the Silicoids decided that it would do harm to the humankind?”
    \Why did the Silicoids decide that it would harm humans?”

    It would just direct its development to another way.”
    It would just change the direction of its development.”

    If we reach Graal I would tell you everything and then you will decide…”
    If we reach Graal, I will tell you everything and then you can decide…”

    “Have you been swimming in them too when you lived here?”
    Had you ever swam these channels when you lived here before?

  11. #131
    Завсегдатай Ramil's Avatar
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    Re: Please check my translation.

    After a long pause I continue

    11

    When Kay returned to the cabin Tommy had only just begun washing. It took him nearly ten minutes to realize that the airlock wouldn’t open and the ship wouldn’t call the police. Kay expected something like that. He prepared supper and was finishing a glass of wine before Tommy Arano risked going out from the shower.
    “Are you hungry?” Kay asked in a friendly manner. “It’s unhealthy to eat this late but we’re not going to sleep any soon.”
    Tommy averted his eyes. He had already formed up an opinion about Kay’s actions and expected nothing good.
    “Have some food.” Kay repeated and filled up his glass again, “Wait, come here.”
    The boy didn’t have any other choice. He obeyed. Kay took a metal comb from the back pocket of his jeans and ran his finger along its sharp teeth with an evil grin.
    “You forgot to comb your hair, Arthy.”
    “My name is Tommy Arano.” the boy said hopelessly.
    “I forgot. The parting is on the left, right? There was a hair-dryer, by the way, but we’re not going to grand-opera.”
    Kay put the comb into his pocket and started to unbutton Tommy’s shirt that was still dump. The boy strained, but didn’t risk resisting.
    “I thought as much.” Kay said with satisfaction looking at the burnt scar on Tommy’s left shoulder. “I missed several inches… So, what is it, you couldn’t afford a proper treatment or you think that scars make little boys more attractive? My friend, they don’t suit even grownups. Go, have some food.”
    Casting cautious looks at Kay Tommy sat and quickly buttoned his shirt up.
    “We’re going to test your digestion,” Kay said as he was playing with his glass. “Why have you stopped? Eat it, it’s just a sausage. Eat, and I’m going to tell you a bedtime story that will upset the gastric juice secretion and intestinal motor activity.”
    He winced as he watched Tommy started chewing obediently.
    “I see they’ve put you down quite hard, boy. Your bravery remained but your will is in ruins. You can flare up, but you cannot blaze… Compared to that, your shrunken biceps and thin shoulders are nothing.”
    Tommy lowered his half eaten sausage and for the first time looked at Kay with a hint of curiosity.
    “What do you remember? A year ago you’ve been perfectly developed… for a kid, of course. But you forgot tow to keep fit.”
    “I’m growing up,” Tommy said.
    “Yeah, inwards perhaps. Eat, you need proteins. And stop being afraid, I’m not going to kill you. You cannot even imagine what punishment you’ve just escaped… you’re a lucky fellow.”
    Tommy looked at Kay with distrust.
    “Do you know who Curtis Van Curtis is?”
    “I’ve got seven points in political science,” Tommy said with an indecisive pride.
    “And who is Arthur Van Curtis?”
    “His son… I think.”
    “Let’s have it this way for now. Eat! Our story begins in a shabby hotel where a man known as Kay Althos was sleeping peacefully. A day before he switched to manual control as he was landing his hyperboat and its gravity drives killed a girl who was doing her own small business…” Kay put away his glass and changed tone, “If it’s so important to you, Kay Althos didn’t want to kill her. He may even apologize before the boy who thinks he’s that girl’s brother. And he forgives the boy for killing him.”
    “You are alive,” Tommy said.
    “I’m afraid it’s not for very long. I would never have another aThan. In a sense, you did kill me permanently. But I’m asking you to forgive me.”
    Kay stood up, walked to Tommy and put a hand on his shoulder.
    “I’m very sorry. I’ve never killed anyone aimlessly, neither children nor adults.”
    “Why are you telling me this?” Tommy asked. He was weeping quietly.
    “You will understand. You’re a smart boy even though you’ve been deprived of your former knowledge. Just listen to the story to the end, all right?”
    “All right,” Tommy said.

    When Kay had stopped speaking, he was finishing the bottle of Mrshhan wine and Tommy was nearly done with his first sausage.
    “I don’t believe you,” the boy said, “You’re lying. You’ve learnt that there was an accident a year ago and made up this… this…”
    “… very, very long story, why? I could just let it go; I could torture you, but why would I lie, Arthy?”
    “My name is Tommy!”
    “Whatever. Why would I lie? And what was that accident that made you lose all your memories but left no scratch on you?”
    Kay suddenly bent over the table and slapped Tommy’s cheek. The boy ducked and grabbed Kay’s hand.
    “Go ahead,” Kay cheered him up. “Continue your move and you will break my fingers. This is a move of Synthesis Yo-Do and you know that technique quite well. You’re a little killing machine, Arthy-Tommy. You had your personality erased but they didn’t erase your base memory so that you wouldn’t piss in your pants and wouldn’t have to learn how to talk again. I don’t know why the Silicoids were so soft-hearted but say thanks to them for this. One course of Synthesis Yo-Do and you can use it consciously. You do very well at school in spite of the fact that you, like your friends, spit on your studies. Do you know why? You don’t learn, you remember. You’ve seen Emperor Gray himself not to mention lesser riffraff. You can fly this ship, a destroyer even. You are Arthur Van Curtis, a clone of Curtis senior. You’ve been a prince and became a pauper.”
    Tommy Arano slowly relaxed his grip. Kay’s hand completed the move and slowly patted Tommy’s cheek.
    “You’re not from Cailis, you’re from Terra. You have been undergoing aThan for dozens of times… and one day they’ve decided to stop you with a new method. They partially succeeded. Now you are Tommy.”
    “Clones don’t have a soul…” the boy whispered.
    “They have. Otherwise aThan wouldn’t have worked, right? We can argue whether you have a soul or what had left of it when Arthur Curtis was reanimated on Terra. But I’m not a theologian. I don’t care if your soul has split in two halves, divided in two or the One Will mercifully provided you with a new one. You’re not a zombie, you have a free will and you can use aThan. By the way, the neural grid is already implanted in your head.”
    “Why do you need me?”
    “For the vilest purposes one can imagine.”
    Tommy moved away.
    “Don’t be afraid, my goals are even viler than this. You’re my picklock, my jack of trumps which I’m going to hide in my sleeve. A king or ace would be more helpful, but we will just have to bluff.”
    “I don’t believe you,” Tommy repeated stubbornly. “And even if you’re telling the truth, why should I get involved into this?”
    Kay laughed.
    “Why? Beggarly Cailis or the aThan empire, an accountant’s career or the power over the galaxy, the mysteries of soap operas or the planet Graal, you choose!”
    “This is not mine. There is one Arthur Curtis in this galaxy already, right?”
    “It can find a place for you too, believe me.”
    The boy was silent. Kay leaned back wearily and said “What time is it?”
    Tommy looked at his watch, but it wasn’t him whom Kay was addressing.
    “A half past three local time” the ship informed with a juicy baritone. “Kay, my friend, I’m impressed with your story. No halfwit has ever got into such a mess!”
    “Shut up…” Kay half asked and half ordered. “I’ve become disaccustomed with you, so be a tender and attentive lady.”
    “Of course, my dear. Shall I clean your guns?” the ship responded in a cooing voice.
    “You pest.” Kay said as he was stretching his muscles, “Freak… Tommy, did they expect you this night at home?”
    The boy smiled bitterly.
    “Then call home. Give him a line, ship!”
    Tommy moved sharply and stared at Kay.
    “The number.” Althos said.
    “Are you serious?”
    “Just say the number, the handset is on the table. Tell them you’re going back tomorrow afternoon. You better don’t say anything about where you are, otherwise you’ll be disconnected.”
    “Do you seriously allow me to call?” Tommy repeated.
    Kay covered his eyes wearily and the lights immediately went dimmer.
    “Boy, I had a mother too. Is it so difficult to understand?”
    “Yes” Tommy said with a challenge in his voice.

    Althos patiently listened to the Tommy’s conversation with Mrs. Arano. When all important things had been said as he thought he broke the line with a gesture. He stood up and led Tommy to a door that remained closed till this moment.
    “I have two cabins,” he informed. “This is yours.”
    “Are you going to lock me in?” the boy asked.
    “Of course, I don’t have the aThan anymore, remember. Good night.”
    Tommy fell to sleep quickly, without undressing. His fears were weakened, but he was too tired and overdosed with information.
    Kay forced himself to brush his teeth and remove his shoes.
    Send me a PM if you need me.

  12. #132
    Завсегдатай Ramil's Avatar
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    Re: Please check my translation.

    PART SIX. IMMORTALITY FOR A PAUPER

    1

    “I took a liberty to wake you up,” said the ship. Kay opened his eyes. He was in his boat, the most habitual and homey place of the universe. He had no home so he made it himself. He had a citizenship of the Empire and a personal planet ten yards in diameter.
    “Something happened?” he asked.
    “No, but it’s already noon according the local time.” the ship’s voice was dry and formal this time. Kay winced but said nothing.
    A cold shower helped to remove all traces of sleep and a razor removed the growth on his face. Then Kay changed his clothes, carefully and slowly selecting each piece – a beige slack suit which he usually put on only during the first few months after aThan, a white shirt which was much more expensive than an ordinary one but it could reflect a laser beam of an average power, and soft leather shoes.
    “You look great, master.”
    “I know. Is the boy awake?”
    “Not yet. He’s in the fast sleeping phase. Shall I wake him up?”
    “Just unlock the door. Should I put on a tie?”
    “Of course. Shall I read some classics?”
    “Playing a butler? What have you been reading?”
    The ship was silent for a moment.
    “Go ahead”, Kay agreed, “but don’t forget about the breakfast.”
    “Thank you for your confidence. Your evening sausages were awful, by the way.”
    “What?”
    “Nothing” the ship replied quickly, “Let me suggest an original novel of the late twentieth century that tells about mysterious events that took place in the town of…”
    “Wait”, Kay was thoughtfully looking at the two ties deciding which one to put on, “Do you remember you started reading a book about a pilot that had crushed in a desert. Continue that one.”
    “You ordered me to delete the text.” the ship noted coldly.
    “You sound as if you’d obeyed that order.”
    “Yes, I did.”
    “So the text is in your short term memory. Recover it and continue.”
    “All right. So stopped at the moment when the pilot woke up thousand miles away from the nearest habitat… I must note that it is a great exaggeration. His flyer was damaged…”
    “I remember, read on,” Kay sat in the armchair having chosen a dark golden tie at last. The ship’s voice changed into a soft tenor:
    “All this was so mysterious and inconceivable that I did not dare to refuse. However absurd this was here in the desert, within a hair of death…”
    Tommy Arano awoke but stayed in the bed for a long time. He didn’t know how long his imprisonment would last. When finally he decided to try opening the door it was unlocked. This surprised him as much as the fact that he was still alive.
    Kay Altos was sitting in the armchair and was looking sooner like a young teacher than a thug for hire. The ship’s voice which appeared surprisingly sad to Tommy stopped talking in the middle of the phase:
    “On the star, on the planet, on my planet called Earth…”
    “Go wash yourself.” Kay ordered to Tommy, “There is a pack in the bathroom, inside you will find a toothbrush and a towel.”
    Tommy nodded and walked through the room trying very hard not to get too close to Altos. Then his curiosity prevailed and he asked:
    “Why does your ship changes its voice all the time?”
    “It hasn’t yet determined his self-consciousness,” Kay said being quite serious, “It doesn’t know its gender, age and social status.”
    The boy preferred not to pursue the matter.

    Darian Arano, a clerk of the Cailis Nature Preservation Department didn’t go to work this day. He concluded that it wouldn’t do any more harm to those remnants of planetary nature and his rank of waters control inspector allowed him such liberties. He was half-lying on a low and wide sofa, looking indifferently at the TV screen and cracking salt nuts. The beer in a big plastic bottle had turned warm and disgusting, but getting a new one from the fridge was worth too much effort. The public channel was showing ‘Seven minutes about beautiful life’ – a program sponsored by the government.
    “Here’s what I think,” an elderly lady was talking from the screen. She wore a luxurious, but loose-bodied dress made of biosilk, and on the badly laid background behind her, there was a luxurious estate in the mountains, “… there will be days, and very soon, when the young would stop looking for other worlds, our boys and girls wouldn’t go to bed with each new tourist from Tauri, and our scientists would stop trying to go to Endoria. Things will be quite the opposite! Getting a residence permit will become a dream of all planets of the Empire! We just need to roll up our sleeves and get to work. Work and work and stop dreaming. I think so.”
    Galya, Darian’s wife, came out from the kitchen. She glanced at her husband, took a beer bottle from the fridge and silently put it nearby. He accepted this sign of spousal concern with a slight but gentle smile.
    He asked:
    “Tell Luke to make his music quieter.”
    Galya nodded. She sat by his side looking at the screen where a handsome officer was theoretitizing about beautiful life against the background (badly laid) with a sporting flyer.
    She asked:
    “Will Tommy come, what do you think?”
    “Where else can he go.” Darian grumbled as he was opening the bottle with beer.
    “It didn’t happen before…”
    “He must have found a girlfriend. Or wasting time with his schoolmates. Foreign blood, what can I say…”
    “Darian!”
    “What? I don’t say anything…” Arano took a gulp of beer, “A good deed… will be rewarded.”
    Galya left without saying anything. The door to his elder son’s room slammed shut and the roaring of asynchronous music quieted down reluctantly. Darian was looking at the screen where a charming woman against the background with a desk that was slightly falling out of the three-dimensional perspective was saying:
    “We don’t need somebody else’s amenities. We are not going to look at Terra or Galathea. It comes out of the general mentality of Cailis. The phase of buildup is completed, I am telling this as a social psychologist. An inevitable prosperity awaits us.”
    Darian was patiently waiting for the beginning of an Endorian detective. It would be unfair to say that a featured movie that was ridiculously expensive in video stores was more important a reason for him than the disappearance of his adopted son. But two stimuli are always better than one, right?
    A doorbell rang. The brand-new security system (this technology was very well developed on Cailis, they even made it for export) informed: “Tommy came. Unarmed. He is accompanied by a man of middle years, in a good physical shape. Armed.”
    There was a warning sound and the system went silent for a moment, then it added:
    “Many weapons, the identification is suppressed by a local nullifier. I’ll be unable to resist. Shall I call the police?”
    Darian jumped up spilling the beer. He came to the door where Galya was already standing and smiling helplessly at her husband. The system screen showed Tommy. He was very bleak and stiff. Beside him there was a man of mid-thirties who was dusting invisible specks off his suit.
    “What kind of trouble did he get into?” Darian hesitated, looking at the stranger.
    The security system was still working and recording. Besides, Tommy didn’t look all that frightened.
    “Maybe it’s a Body officer?” Galya looked at her husband’s face sheepishly. The Body of Order commanded more respect than the Imperial Service on Cailis.
    “Unlock,” Darian ordered. The door slid aside revealing the dirty stairwell and bluish armored entrances of adjacent apartments.
    “Mom…” Tommy said when Galya embraced him. The man gave a slight nod to Darian and asked:
    “May I enter?”
    “Who are you?” Darian was still hesitating. The stranger’s figure reminded him with a cruel frankness about his paunch that had been growing up since the last year and his rare visits to a gym. The man’s gaze was too self-confident.
    “I’m a Tommy’s friend.”
    The boy that had been clutching to his mother turned and looked at the man. He looked like he wanted to say something, but chose not to.
    “Aha,” Darian said. “Interesting. Come in then.”
    The man refused neither beer nor a cigar thus causing even more antipathy in Darian. He sipped beer, lighted up a cigar and left it smoking in an ashtray. Then he introduced himself:
    “Kay Althos, a defense and offense specialist.”
    Arano chocked on his beer and said:
    “Darian, an ecologist.”
    “Wonderful, we’re nearly colleagues.” Kay squinted at Galya who was eyeing him quite disapprovingly, “I am sorry for your night worries, we had to talk.”
    Darian was desperately trying to maintain a casual tone:
    “We have an unquiet district here… mister Althos. There was an incident… a couple dozen boys were put in hospital last night.”
    “How many dead?” Kay inquired vividly.
    “No… everybody is alive.”
    “A nice professional work then, no doubt.”
    Arano added two and two and didn’t like the result.
    “So, to what do we owe you?”
    “One small question,” Kay was all courtesy, “how much did you get for adopting Tommy and passing yourself for his parents?”
    Darian realized that this was the only moment he could point Kay at the door, but he couldn’t throw the night incident with the street gang out of his head.
    “What the…”
    “Miss…,” Kay turned over to Galya, “I think that you weren’t the worst parents for the boy. But he has a real family and a real place in this world.”
    “I am his mother,” Galya said quickly, “We’ve lost our daughter not long ago, but nobody’s going to take my son from me.”
    Kay Althos averted his eyes for some reason and turned to Darian again.
    “Sooner or later your elder son or your former friends will give you away. Or the boy will think why you haven’t got a single childhood photograph or a video…”
    “Tommy, leave us!” Galya raised her voice.
    “He can’t.” Kay raised his hand and showed a power bracelet. This attribute was a popular enough element of assorted detectives and blockbusters to be confused with something else. Galya gasped and clutched Tommy’s hand.
    “Your act isn’t a crime by itself, quite the opposite,” Kay continued, “but you were working for the Basis of Silicoids…”
    “What?” Darian roared.
    “Alas, it was aliens who erased the boy’s memory. You are their accessories… involuntary ones, I hope. I can prove that to the Service or the Body of Order if necessary, but must I? Tell me the truth and I’ll leave. I give you my word of honor. How much did you get?”
    “This apartment and five hundred imperial credits.” Darian didn’t hesitate. When things were getting down to hating the aliens the president of Cailis was more zealous at that than the Emperor himself.
    “Not much.” Kay said rising up. “Besides, a true good must be unselfish, right?”
    He removed the bracelet from his hand and dropped it onto the floor. Then he took Tommy’s chin and looked into his eyes. Galya didn’t dare to interfere.
    “Now you know that I was telling the truth,” Kay didn’t notice anyone else in the room, as it appeared, “You decide what to do with it. I need a partner, not a slave on a leash. I’ll be waiting for you in the car for three hours. Decide.”
    “I won’t let him go!” Galya cried out, “In spite of everything, he’s my son! I’m going to lock the door and you can die in your car!”
    “If the boy doesn’t go out willingly, he wouldn’t be able to help me.” Kay shrugged his shoulders, “So, calm down please.”
    He walked to the door and it opened so quickly that one could think the security system wanted him to leave as soon as possible. Kay turned from the doorway and said:
    “Tommy! Galaxy, power, a real life. Decide.”

    Looking through the glass at the rain Kay ate two sandwiches prepared by the ship and smoked a couple of cigarettes with some light drug from the pack that someone had left in the car. He didn’t like the cigarettes, his organism was insusceptible for many kinds of drugs – it was a peculiarity of his nervous system that had been rebuilt even before his birth.
    In two hours and a half Tommy came out of the multistory block of flats where he had been living for the only year of his conscious life and walked to the car.
    He was carrying a shoulder bag, wearing the same jeans and thin black shirt that got soaked in a matter of seconds. Kay turned on the heating and unlocked the doors.
    “Altos, I want to lay down a condition,” the boy said stubbornly staying under the rain.
    “Friends call me Duch. Speak.”
    “Swear that you won’t kill me.”
    Kay shrugged:
    “It becomes my traditional oath to the Curtis’s. I won’t, sit down.”
    Tommy sat on the back seat and turned a heating louver to himself. Mizan was accelerating fast.
    “Does your shiner hurt?” inquired Kay.
    Tommy rubbed a fresh bruise under his eye and shook his head:
    “No… not really.”
    “You have a very high pain threshold,” Kay said, “this is the only thing that comforts me when I think about Arthur.”
    “Kay, is he… my double… is he good?”
    “He’s very unhappy. He’s good, I think.”
    “Ah…”
    “Curtis Van Curtis is a man within himself. He’s more complicated than the aThan.”
    Kay went silent and completed the phrase only in a couple of minutes when Tommy sat back and started to doze off:
    “I wish I knew the old man’s plan. And which of the things that had happened were planned a month or even a century ago.”
    Send me a PM if you need me.

  13. #133
    Завсегдатай Ramil's Avatar
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    Re: Please check my translation.

    2

    Gorra was one of the oldest human colonies. Here, they still called Terra Earth sometimes and two universities had opened archeology departments. The ruling family claimed to have traced its origins back to Gagarin himself.
    Emperor Gray was indulgent about all this. The planet paid taxes regularly, its young people willingly joined the Imperial forces and the faction of Gorra in the Senate never caused any trouble. Gorra took pride in its full self-suffiency. Terra could upkeep the scientists of the Empire and millions of artist, writers and other spongers, Endoria built ships, half-starving Incedios fed nearby mining colonies, Tauri provided fruits for half of the Empire. Gorra did a little bit of everything. Rumors were circulating among the locals that the reserve palace of the Emperor is located on Gorra rather than Endoria. They even named the place – a closed region in the Blue Canyons that had been bought by a private person even before the Feud War.
    Lika Saker knew that there was no Emperor's palace in the Canyons. She had been living and ruling here long enough to scan all the surroundings. Today her morning began with the visit of her chief of security. According the rule established long ago, all important messages in the Canyons were delivered aurally. Lika was taking a morning bath when the meklon approached the pool. The water was transparent, only slightly colored with aromatic oils, but the meklon was indifferent to human nakedness. Lika didn’t feel any embarrassment in the presence of the cyborg also, besides, its gender was sooner female.
    “A report” the meklon said as it froze at a safe distance from the pool. Water wasn’t all that dangerous for its transformed body already, but its instincts had not yet gotten used to that.
    “I listen, Cas/s/is,” Lika stretched her body feeling as strong cool jets started to massage her body.
    “There is a ship in the orbit. Its landing trajectory leads to our zone.”
    Lika frowned:
    “Ship’s type?”
    “A hyperboat,” the meklon’s armored breastplate opened and a video terminal appeared, “it’s an old model, its armament is weak, the defense module is enhanced. It represents no danger but it flies very confidently.”
    The youngest in the whole history of the human crime Mother-keeper of the ‘Family’ looked at the ship. It seemed familiar as if she had seen it before or even fly it…
    “Provide a corridor, Cas/s/is,” Saker remembered it at last, “It’s a friend. An old friend.”
    The meklon turned to the door.
    “And send a valet here!” Lika called after. She lowered her head and the halo of ash-blond hair spread over the water soaking slowly. She smiled at the decorated ceiling that had been brought here a hundred years before from some Terran cathedral. A half lying male figure on the central fresco had always reminded her of Kay, “Still, you remember,” whispered Lika.
    The man on the fresco that had been rising from the ground for thousands of years continued to look at the timelessness. He took no interest in the strange games of his descendants.
    “Careful, patient, overclever little Kay…” Lika said as she closed her eyes.

    They walked along a short corridor that had been melted through the rock. A man with a couple of artificial limbs, either a mechanist or simply a man having no aThan, walked ahead of Kay and Tommy. A meklon walking on his hind limbs that was a variant of battle transformation brought up their rear.
    Tommy stayed close to Kay. During the last day his doubts had not disappeared completely… but he had only seen cyborgs on TV before. The aliens were not welcomed on the peripheral planets.
    The corridor ended with an iridescent force field that had been working in the curtain mode. Behind it, there was a round hall with a vaulted ceiling. Light was coming through a stained glass window.
    “Wait here,” said the man. The lower part of his face was made of dark-yellow metal, his lips barely moved as he talked, but his voice nevertheless appeared real.
    “We’ll wait,” Kay agreed. The hall was nearly empty with the exception of a dozen of large satin cushions that were lying right on the floor in the center. It looked like they were supposed to sit on them, but they weren’t invited to.
    “Duch…” Tommy whispered.
    “Relax,” Kay ordered not looking at the boy. They waited for nearly a quarter of an hour in the silent company of the meklon and the cyborg-man. Then a segment of the wall slid aside making no sound. Tommy saw a woman in a plain black silk dress whose age was closer to fifty, being still beautiful and slender, but evidently past her meridian. He wasn’t impressed very much. The only thing that the boy liked, considering himself an expert in Imperial movie stars and fashion models, was her ash-blond hair that fell on her shoulders like a soft waterfall.
    Kay looked at Lika Saker who could afford yearly aThans but stubbornly continued to live her first life. He noted a total lack of any makeup and a simple dress.
    “I have accepted your invitation, Lika” Kay said.
    “You took your time, Duch.” the woman came closer.
    “So did you.”
    Saker shrugged:
    “Nobody has been teaching you manners, it appears. I washed off my makeup, Duch, and tried to find as plain a dress as possible.”
    The meklon felt its equivalent of surprise when the Mother-Keeper embraced Kay and put her head on his chest. The cyborg-man was unable to feel emotions – his brain by half consisted of microchips. He simply noted that the threat level had lowered.
    Lika raised her head looking at Kay and asked:
    “Have you been through the aThan recently?”
    “Yes, it’s great you manage without it.”
    “Liar.”
    “I am very glad to see you the same, Lika” Kay said.
    Saker shifted her gaze onto Tommy. The boy was smiling awkwardly.
    “A client and a partner.” Kay informed.
    “Yes?”Lika said dubiously, “you look tired, boy.”
    “We’ve covered the distance from Cailis in twenty two hours” Kay replied instead of him. “Entered the hyperspace without acceleration and jumped out in the photosphere of your star. It took seven correcting jumps. I thought my brain will leak out through my ears… and it’s Tommy’s first flight.”
    “aThan has made you rash.” Lika noted with a slight surprise in her voice.
    “Andrew, show the boy to the guest room and give instructions to the servants. And have the doctor examine him.”
    The cyborg moved to Tommy and he cast a fearful glance at Duch.
    “Go,” Kay nodded, “don’t be afraid.”
    Lika laughed quietly and said:
    “You will get the help you’ve came here for. Don’t worry. I can do much these days.”
    “I’m afraid that not even much will be enough for me.”
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  14. #134
    Завсегдатай Ramil's Avatar
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    Re: Please check my translation.

    EDIT: Fixed some mistakes and typos.

    3

    At night, the Blue Canyons resembled some fairy-tale country. Pseudo-crystal nodules which Gorra took pride in were too poor for industrial mining here, but they emerged right on the rock surface and every star in the cloudless sky shared a spark of its light with them. It seemed like they were surrounded by a sleeping town with dark silhouettes of buildings and dim lights of blinded windows…
    “The family has picked a beautiful place.” Kay said.
    “We love beauty” Lika agreed, “Are you warm? Shall I turn on the screen?”
    “No, it was colder on the shoals at night…” Kay Duch found Saker’s hand in the darkness and asked quietly: “Do you see Shedar?”
    “I do, my landsman.”
    They were lying side by side, still heated from love and shimmering rocks around them argued with the starry sky over them. The terrace on which Saker had arranged her bedroom topped a lone cliff and Kay involuntary remembered Curtis with his ‘study’ on the top of the spire-house.
    “Have you been there… after…”
    “No.”
    “I have once… for three days.”
    “Kay, please, don’t.”
    “The oceans are still boiling, but on the central archipelago the land is not burning any more. The Empire has established a control outpost on the Elder Sister. It took less damage than the others. It is automatic for the time being.”
    “Why are you telling me this, Kay?”
    “I haven’t seen any of our friends for a long time.”
    “Why, Duch?”
    Kay turned and looked into the face which looked young again in the darkness.
    “Do they hear us here?”
    “They do, but never mind them. I am the Mother-Keeper, Kay. I’m leading the Family for another two years.”
    “Do you remember our oath, Lika?”
    The woman didn’t answer.
    “A dirty cargo hold, and berths to the ceiling, the stink, and a glass of water per day. The Sakkra’s interceptors on our tail…”
    “I remember everything!”
    “Do you want to forget, Lika?” there was fury in Kay’s voice. “Your mother was with you and your account in the Endorian bank wasn’t confiscated. I got the asylum on Althos… You were growing up in your own house; you went to school and were falling in love with young Endorians. I received the Christmas presents and your postcards, thank you!”
    “Kay, we did try to get you out!”
    “Yes, you did. Especially your…”
    “Leave my mother alone. She died three years ago. She refused the aThan. She knew where the money came from.”
    “I’m sorry. But I had been waiting for four years. A little boy who believed in the promises of grownups.”
    “Don’t make me suffer, Kay” Lika whispered, “You’ve been waiting for forty years just to come here and tell me that?”
    “No. Do you remember our oath? I decided to keep it.”
    Saker forced a shaky laugh.
    “Everyone who is guilty… we’ll live to revenge. Kay! Sakkra is no more!”
    “It wasn’t Sakkra who burned our fathers.”
    The woman from Shedar the Second sat on the bed and asked dryly:
    “Whom are you going to take revenge on? Upon life? I came here because I hated the Empire. But even mafia is just a gear in its mechanism. Gray could have ground us to dust, but why would the Emperor want a thousand rabid rats instead of one rabid dog? I speak with him every month, Kay! It’s all about the balance of powers and revenues. This is the way it works.”
    “I have the key to all powers.”
    Lika Saker was silent for three seconds. Then she said:
    “The boy with the probability of seventy percent.”
    “Right, super.” Kay said with satisfaction, “these neurons of yours still work perfectly well. It’s the boy.”
    Lika patted his chest:
    “I’ve been thinking you’ve changed your preferences.”
    “Thank you very much.”
    “You’re welcome. Who is he?”
    “I won’t answer… for now. You will know everything… in time.”
    “Kay, nobody talks to me this way!”
    “I have this right… sister.”
    “Duch! We’re from different families!”
    “We’re from the same test-tube. Twenty nine percent of common genes – isn’t it enough to be relatives? Do you remember you asked your mother whether we could marry?”
    “I don’t need to ask anyone now, Kay…”
    The woman stood up, walked along the terrace edge over the shimmering bottomless abyss and bent over a table with drinks.
    “I’ll have brut, Lika.”
    “I remember, I’ve gone off sweetness too.”
    Saker returned with two glasses of champagne. She handed one to Kay and asked:
    “I could go through aThan, if you like. My matrix was taken at the age of twenty two. I was a very pretty… girl.”
    “Everything is good in its own time. Lika.”
    “I see.”
    “Now, it’s time to remember the old oaths.”
    “Don’t apologize, you don’t know how. What do you want?”
    “Will you help me with no conditions?”
    “Yes.”
    Kay Duch sat and took a drink of champagne.
    “I need the best weapon and armor one can get in the galaxy, all your informants network working for me, fighters that can stand against a meklon cyborg, and no questions.”
    Saker was silent for a long time.
    “You will get everything, Kay Duch.”
    “Then go and start the machine. I have to know the whereabouts of Isabelle Kahl, the deputy commander of the ISS on Incedios. She flies a Service corvette with a hull number starting with six. She had support of Imperial troopers from Lemach’s group that is based on Dogar.”
    “With the probability of fifty seven percent she’s on Dogar.”
    “Kahl left a dozen of troopers to die in spite of the fact that she had a meklon and a mechanist onboard the corvette.”
    “Two against one – on Incedios.”
    “She left to die a bulrathi and a support executive from Incedios. I don’t need your guesses, Lika. I need precise information!”
    “Are you throwing us against the army and the ISS?”
    “Yes.”
    “Good.” Saker said, “wait here.”
    Kay laughed as he put his glass on the floor. The only way that was available for him to leave was through the aThan – to Terra.”
    When Lika returned in half an hour he was already asleep.
    “You have always been a thick-skinned shark.” Saker said as she lay down beside him. “Hop! And you’re already hitting the sack.”
    “Sharks can’t stop even for sleep.” Kay replied suddenly in surprisingly clear voice, “They sleep in motion.”
    “Then kiss me in a sleep. Be so kind.”
    “When you allow someone to tame you, sometimes you have to cry…” Kay said as he turned over.
    “You can do neither of these, Duch.”
    “The stars cry for me.”
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  15. #135
    Завсегдатай Crocodile's Avatar
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    Re: Please check my translation.

    ...its gender was sooner female...
    I noticed that usage of "sooner" several times in your text. I wonder shouldn't it be "rather" instead?

  16. #136
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    Re: Please check my translation.

    Quote Originally Posted by Crocodile
    ...its gender was sooner female...
    I noticed that usage of "sooner" several times in your text. I wonder shouldn't it be "rather" instead?
    Maybe, maybe not. I really don't know.
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  17. #137
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    Re: Please check my translation.

    At night
    grabbed?
    found Saker's
    but on the central
    any more
    were falling in
    just to come
    until we revenge -- I don't understand sentence.
    going to revenge to? same here
    could have ground
    thousand rabid rats
    -- can't do any more. this is difficult for me to follow.

  18. #138
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    Re: Please check my translation.

    4

    Kay woke Tommy up early in the morning, made him quickly wash his face and eat and then dragged him to the exit from the underground complex. There was several men standing guard near the exit but all necessary instructions were already given. They were shown to the flyer pad and Kay chose a standard imperial model.
    Kay didn’t want to risk taking off from the canyon on manual control. He chose to trust the autopilot this time. Apparently, the autopilot was programmed by a man with taste. At first, the flyer climbed to the plateau level and then circled around the rocks they had been inside not long before.
    “Kay, who are they?” Tommy asked.
    “When your friends on the motorcycles were looting another house, whom did they pay twenty five percent to?”
    “To the overseer.”
    “And whom did he pay to?”
    The boy shrugged his shoulders.
    “Here, in this hole, is the top of that pyramid.”
    The flyer set on course. The rocky hills have lost all their recent charm in the bright sunlight stretched to the horizon.
    “They don’t even hide.”
    “Both the planetary government and the Emperor know about them, but they too have their interest here.”
    Tommy put his forehead against the window. Below them there were populated areas already – small squares of fields, occasional estates and neat threads of roads.
    “Have I really met Emperor Gray?”
    “Yes, I think… What are you looking at?”
    “Nothing. It’s just I’ve never flown a flyer before.”

    The aThan office on Gorra was large – a rich planet required a lot of immortality. In spite of traditions it wasn’t even isolated and was located on the suburbs of the capital. Many service areas were located on the surface – that too was a sign of Curtis’s indulgence.
    Tamura was receiving secondary clients – it was a routine and a low-pay job. But this small Japanese man that had worked his way to become an aThan employee five years before was patient. He was stoically saving for his first aThan (with a due discount for the personnel of course).
    The day promised to be good. He had accommodated a nervous woman who told him a boring story about her recent death in a plane crush; an elderly businessman that had died from cancer and suspected that his new body also had the aptitude for an incurable growth, and a young fellow who was unspecific about his profession that rewarded him with a laser beam to the back of his head. The guy had just appeared from the aThan and was in a particular hurry to see his own funeral and the faces of his friends who didn’t know about his immortality.
    Then another two clients were sent to Tamura – a free trader from Endoria and his son. The trader was screwy and talked about great price differences on different planets, but agreed at the end that the conditions on Gorra are rather mild.
    Tamura checked the numbers of their neural grids. It was a standard procedure but it aroused a great interest in a boy for some reason. He filled in the forms of contracts and specified the details (resurrect immediately, resurrect within a day, whether to notify the relatives), then he took Kay Ovald’s aThan credit card. The money was nearly out, it was no wonder that the tradesman had been hesitating.
    “Let me congratulate you with immortality,” Tamura said with almost sincere a smile, “I hope your next visit will take place in a very long time from now.”
    “I have a small favor to ask,” mister Ovald said shaking his hand, “could we leave a letter of gratitude to Van Curtis?”
    Tamura had suspected that daily letters of gratitude to Curtis when printed would make a roll thicker than a roll of toilet paper, but marketing traditions were respected in aThan, so he handed a company’s letterhead to the Endorian.
    “Dear mister Curtis, our benefactor,” Kay Ovald repeated the fruits of his inspiration aloud. “We live again and wish you the same. I think you wouldn’t be surprised at our aThan prolongation, but rather you’ll be glad at that. The line of our dreams leads us to a long journey and hard work. Arthur thinks now you’re all but father to him while I can say only tanks. I hope I’ll be able to pay you with the same frankness and honesty that we had found in your words. Kay and Arthur.”
    There were enough idiots among the aThan’s clients. But an idiot with money was a very useful and respectful thing, so Tamura bowed and put a filled letter in a special folder to send it with evening hyper-mail.

    Their way back seemed to take longer. Tommy was gnawing at the hard ice-cream that Kay had bought near the aThan complex. Duch was listening to the evening news on the radio. Four newscasters at once were exchanging jokes and allusions that only a local could understand. They were talking primarily about accidents that seemed to become more frequent on imperial factories. Somebody even compared them with the Darlok terror during the war. Then they started gossiping about a new kind of checks for implanted weapon that were carried out on all large imperial enterprise by ISS officers. They were scanning backs and necks with special detectors for some reason. People were arrested with the set procedures ignored – they simply got stunned with no warning.
    It didn’t occur to anybody to make a connection between checks and diversions.
    “Kay, I would have resuscitated anyway, right?” Tommy asked, “Even with my aThan unpaid?”
    “Of course,” Kay agreed, “Curtis would have taken your death for Arthur’s.”
    “I see.” Tommy said thinking of something.
    “It’s not that easy,” Kay said looking at the boy, “Firstly, I promised not to kill you. Secondly, Curtis would have gotten to truth in two minutes.”
    “The second thing is more important,” Tommy said.
    “Obviously.”
    Further on they were flying in silence.

    Lika Saker had enough matters to attend to that even Kay’s appearance couldn’t cancel. She tried to reduce them to a minimum, but nevertheless, she could only see Duch at dinner.
    “Still noting.” she informed laconically.
    “I see.” Kay answered.
    They dined together. Tommy too was admitted to Mother-Keeper’s little banquette. The table setting would have satisfied the Emperor himself. The menu was apparently composed according the principle of changing of rare courses with the rarest ones. Kay didn’t particularly like gastronomic experiments, but nevertheless, he appreciated the deepwater fish fillet from Dogar and a mix of ice grape and spinach that had nearly disappeared during the Feud War. The idea of feeding the disinformation that spinach was the most important and vital element of human ration to the Meklons had been invented by a man with a very strange sense of humor, apparently. For seven years, Meklon biologists, the best in the galaxy, had been developing the most deadly virus that attacked spinach. About eight thousand bombers that were disseminating the S-virus over human planets were easy targets for interceptors. When the Meklons realized that the humankind deprived of spinach showed no signs of imminent extinction, the shock was too great for them to bear. The cyborgs had agreed to negotiate peace. The Tripartite Alliance was the end result of it.
    But spinach could only grow in fully hermetic chambers with closed ecology cycle since then. The sneaky virus continued to await its victim in wheat, potatoes and other cultures of lesser importance.
    Tommy was consuming Tasian jelly masterfully handling a pair of silver pincers.
    “You are very well-mannered, boy” Saker noted. Tommy who was artfully separating the orange layer from the green one didn’t understood her. He thought he ate Tasian jelly for the first time in his life.
    “What about equipment, Lika?” Kay tried to lead the conversation away from the slippery topic.
    “We’re going to visit our armourer after dinner.” Saker handed Tommy an underipe gurange fruit.
    “Just a moment,” the boy said and correctly picked a tube screw from assorted cutlery. He screwed it into the fruit and returned the seasoning to Lika.
    Gurange, of course, wasn’t suited for jelly. But it was perfect for white meat.

    It took them nearly twenty minutes to get to the parts of underground complex where the armory was located. Enough for Kay to realize who exactly was working for the Family.
    Sevold Martynenko was a living legend. He created nearly half of Feud War weapon models. He only left his laboratory about three times per year when a manifestation of pacifists was taking place nearby. His working over the deadliest weapons seemed to get along well with his pointedly peaceful views. The demonstrators didn’t think so and tried to beat Sevold in spite of his guards. Having failed to participate in the demonstration, Martynenko usually returned to his laboratory and created even more awful machines for killing life in all its aspects.
    If legends were true, during periods of his frequent crises of creativity, the ISS staged pacifist demonstrations.
    “I thought he’s been farming on some quiet planet,” Kay said, “or working under the ISS microscope.”
    “It nearly happened,” Saker liked to speak of her achievements, “When the army had refused his quark bombs due to their excess inhumanity, he stopped his work. The ISS didn’t press on him by orders of the Emperor himself, apparently. He settled on Charisma and became an artist. He illustrated books for children, especially for the young ones, some books of poems. Under a different name, of course. We persuaded him to work a little bit more.”
    “What kind of books?” Tommy inquired.
    “You can ask yourself,” Lika, it appeared, was amused by recent hypostasis of Martynenko, “If he’s in the mood, he will tell you.”
    Sevold was in the mood. He was walking back and forth across the laboratory which amazed both by its size and the volumes of assorted junk scattered all over it. There was nobody else in it – the genius preferred to work alone. He greeted his visitors by waving his hand with a sandwich firmly clutched in it. His second hand was on the control panel of a polymer moulder where a mould of intricate form was awaiting readiness.
    “Come in,” Sevold said in a friendly manner, “Are they my customers, Lika?”
    “Yes,” Saker said as she was sitting down on the only available stool nearby. She neglected neither cosmetics nor a rich garment this time. Sevold, it appeared, didn’t even notice her outward appearance.
    “The armor is ready,” Martynenko informed, “Have you ever heard of ‘Seraph’?”
    Kay hasn’t, but Sevold didn’t pursue the matter.
    “Now we’re going to decide about the weapons…” Sevold murmured as he was walking around Kay and Tommy. He scratched his unshaved cheek. The genius was fat and awkward and it seemed that in his life he had not held anything more dangerous than a fork.
    “You can carry everything, but the boy… the boy will be more difficult. All right.”
    He sat by the desk cluttered with flasks containing some chemical agents and frowned.
    Then he stretched his arm, grasped a large pot with dark-brown liquid in it and sipped.
    “It’s tea”, he informed, “Boy, what have you been using?”
    “Gravibaton…”, Tommy squinted at Kay, “and an algopistol.”
    “That’s disgusting”, Martynenko said with a grimace.
    “Gravity batons and neural activator are weapons of the punks! Understood?”
    “Yeah.”
    “You’ll take ‘Argument-17’,” the gunmaker decided, “It’s light and you don’t have to aim it. We’ll just have to program it to recognize the members of your team or otherwise you would grind them down too.”
    “Add the boy himself to the program,” Kay said.
    Sevold thought for a moment.
    “It’s a good idea. Or he might kill himself accidently. That’s disgusting, isn’t it? I have abased myself so far as to arm children with intellectual weapons… not to mention it was constructed by Karap’tyan…”
    He immediately lost all interest to Tommy. Kay felt a rare feeling of complete exposure under the inteng gaze of the old man. Trying get rid of it he said:
    “I’ve been using a ‘chance’ recently.”
    “So what? It’s a cheap trash, isn’t it? A relic for a museum. A weapon of desperation when they were driving schoolboys into combat… What is it that you haven’t used?”
    Kay made a helpless gesture.
    “Where are you going to fight?”
    “I don’t know”
    “Oh, gods… Lika that won’t do!”
    “We’ll punish the guilty,” Saker promised.
    “Have you been using ‘Excalibur’?”
    “No, that’s the one I haven’t used,” Kay admitted.
    “You’ll learn. Lika, give him an 'Excalubur', a ‘Bumble-bee’ as a light one, and mount a ‘Guardian’ and a ‘Diana’ on his armor. That’s all otherwise he’ll lose mobility.”
    “Do you require anything?” inquired Saker as she was rising.
    “R-E-S-T!”
    Tommy didn’t risk asking what books had Sevold been illustrating. If he had the chance to watch the master armorer after they’d left, however, he would have witnessed an interesting scene. Martynenko produced a sheet of thick paper with a title being already in place. It stated ‘The games of the uncle Bagryants”. He put it against a half-unmade stationary oscillator which occupied half of the table and stared at its yet clear a surface.
    He had a very peaceful mood that day.
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  19. #139
    Завсегдатай Ramil's Avatar
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    Re: Please check my translation.

    5

    “Bitch” Ralph Gordon said. There was no hate in his voice, but rather surprise. The sergeant looked much younger, but Isabelle immediately recognized him. She made a tense smile and advised:
    “Don’t get distracted. Lemach is waiting, isn’t he?”
    Gordon stared at her again and she thought that assigning a man whom she’d killed as her convoy wasn’t incidental of course.
    “Move,” Gordon commanded.
    They were escorted along the corridors of the orbital base by a convoy consisting of twelve men – a reasonable precaution considering the capabilities of the Meklon and the mechanist. Kahl demonstratively took off her armor and weapon. Arthur was walking alongside Marjan – an injection of stimulant allowed him to walk after the Three ‘C’ level interrogation. The boy was only dragging his leg slightly and was squinting painfully when they were walking past bright lamps. They were escorted into a small oval hall at last. There was an automatic stationary turret mounted on the ceiling and the metal walls were fritted in some places.
    “Everyone except Kahl,” her name sounded like a swear word in Gordon’s voice, “will wait here.”
    Escorted by two guards and Ralph Isabelle was transported to the central sector of the base. Lemach was waiting for her in his office, not in the prison cell and that was a small victory by itself.
    There was a guard beside Lemach’s apartments. Kahl prepared to wait but the door opened immediately. Ralph pushed her into the office.
    The admiral was sitting with his back towards the visitors on the panoramic screen before him there was turbulent ocean surf.
    It looked like the picture interested him more than anything else.
    “The detained is here, admiral.” Ralph said.
    “Leave us.”
    Gordon cast another hating gaze at Kahl and left.
    Admiral still didn’t turn around.
    “Your voice sound much younger, Lemach,” Kahl said. Admiral slowly turned in his chair and replied.
    “We have rejuvenated.”
    For several long moments Isabelle looked at the idol of her youth.
    Fifty years old Lemach made her feel like a schoolgirl again.
    “Thank you for meeting me here and not in the interrogation chamber,” she said at last.
    “This is easy to correct,” Lemach informed. Local hypertunnels lead to control centers, to the bridge… to the prison.
    “The boy should be put in prison.”
    “Have you been hunting him? Well-well-well… What did he do, little rascal? Has he perhaps burnt down the ministry of education on Incedios?”
    “He knew too much.”
    “Why ‘knew’?”
    “Because he must not leave here. He has the aThan and this complicates matters… but we must be able to handle that.”
    Lemach smacked his tongue.
    “We? That’s great. But how are we going to handle the immortality?”
    “The boy will explain.”
    Admiral stood up and Kahl noticed the deliberate abruptness of his gestures. It appeared, Lemach had not yet fully played with his new… or old and forgotten body.
    “Speak up.”
    “This is Arthur Curtis, the son of Curtis Van Curtis.”
    Her words had the desired effect, there were flickers of fear and perplexity on Lemach’s face. Pushing forward, Kahl explained:
    “His father is probably using him in some extremely important mission. So important that even aThan would be just a toy compared to it.”
    Lemach paced along the office and asked sharply:
    “Why did you kill my men?”
    “You shouldn’t have put a convoy to me. I wanted to prove I cooperate willingly. Besides, they all have the aThan. I hurt only their wallets and self-esteem. If we made the boy talk the immortality would be as affordable for us as it is for Curtis.
    “Perhaps,” Lemach approached Kahl and looked into her eyes:
    “You’re offering me a gamble that can kill us in a couple of moments. If the boy dies and his father knows about what had happened.”
    “But the prize is also great.”
    “And why do you want to share it between us? The stooges don’t count.”
    “Because the boy is immune to drugs and endures the Thee ‘C’ without a cry. I need a powerful ally whose interrogation school differs from ours.” Kahl replied honestly. And after a moment’s pause she added, “Besides, I like you admiral. Especially now.”
    “Your luck is double then… In this body I’m inclined to gamble,” Lemach turned to the desk, looked at some screen which was invisible to Kahl, touched the sensor and ordered: “Put the boy into the prison block under close supervision. The detainees are free to move around the base with no right to leave it. Arrange cabins for them.”
    He looked at Kahl again and noted:
    “That’s funny… especially the fact that Curtis sends the young son into space. I have good specialists. They will start working immediately. The boy will talk.”
    “Thank you, Lemach.” Kahl didn’t move.
    “I suppose, our strange alliance should be sealed with a small banquet,” the admiral lifter his arms, “Would you like a candlelight dinner?”
    “I’d be glad to, as well as a breakfast in the bed,” Isabelle said sincerely feeling relaxed.
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  20. #140
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    Re: Please check my translation.

    Quote Originally Posted by Ramil
    5

    “Bitch” Ralph Gordon said. There was no hate in his voice, but rather surprise. The sergeant looked much younger, but Isabelle immediately recognized him. She smiled tensely and gave him some advice:
    “Don’t get distracted. Lemach is waiting, isn’t he?”
    Gordon stared at her again and she thought that assigning a man whom she’d killed as her convoy wasn’t incidental of course.
    “Move,” Gordon commanded.
    They were escorted along the corridors of the orbital base by a convoy consisting of twelve men – a reasonable precaution considering the capabilities of the Meklon and the mechanist. Kahl demonstratively took off her armor and weapon. Arthur was walking alongside Marjan – an injection of stimulant allowed him to walk after the Three ‘C’ level interrogations(?). The boy was only dragging his leg slightly and squinted painfully when they were walking past bright lamps. They were escorted into a small oval hall at last. There was an automatic stationary turret mounted on the ceiling and the metal walls were fritted (my dictionary tells me such a word does not exist) in some places.
    “Everyone except Kahl,” her name sounded like a swear word in Gordon’s voice, “will wait here.”
    Escorted by two guards and Ralph, Isabelle was transported to the central sector of the base. Lemach was waiting for her in his office, not in the prison cell, and that was a small victory in itself.
    There was a guard beside Lemach’s apartments. Kahl prepared to wait but the door opened immediately. Ralph pushed her into the office.
    The admiral was sitting with his back towards the visitors. On the panoramic screen before him there was turbulent ocean surf.
    It looked like the picture interested him more than anything else.
    “The detained is here, admiral.” Ralph said.
    “Leave us.”
    Gordon cast another hatful gaze at Kahl and left.
    The admiral still didn’t turn around.
    “Your voice sounds much younger, Lemach,” Kahl said. The Admiral slowly turned in his chair and replied.
    “We have rejuvenated.”
    For several long moments Isabelle looked at the idol of her youth.
    Fifty-year-old Lemach made her feel like a schoolgirl again.
    “Thank you for meeting me here and not in the interrogation chamber,” she said at last.
    That is easy to correct,” Lemach informed her/said. Local hypertunnels lead to control centers, to the bridge… to the prison.
    “The boy should be put in prison.”
    “Have you been hunting him? Well-well-well… What did he do, little rascal? Has he perhaps burnt down the ministry of education on Incedios?”
    “He knew too much.”
    “Why ‘knew’?”
    “Because he must not leave here. He has the aThan and this complicates matters… but we must be able to handle that.”
    Lemach smacked his lips(?)
    “We? That’s great. But how are we going to handle the immortality?”
    “The boy will explain.”
    The Admiral stood up and Kahl noticed the deliberate abruptness of his gestures. It appeared, Lemach had not yet fully played(?) with his new… or old and forgotten body.
    “Speak up.”
    “This is Arthur Curtis, the son of Curtis Van Curtis.”
    Her words had the desired effect, there were flickers of fear and perplexity on Lemach’s face. Pushing forward, Kahl explained:
    “His father is probably using him in some extremely important mission. So important that even aThan would be just a toy compared to it.”
    Lemach paced along the office and asked sharply:
    “Why did you kill my men?”
    “You shouldn’t have put a convoy on me. I wanted to prove I cooperate willingly. Besides, they all have the aThan. I hurt only their wallets and self-esteem. If we made the boy talk _ immortality would be as affordable for us as it is for Curtis.
    “Perhaps,” Lemach approached Kahl and looked into her eyes:
    “You’re offering me a gamble that could kill us in a couple of moments. If the boy dies and his father finds out about what _happened.”
    “But the prize is also great.”
    “And why do you want to share it between us? The stooges don’t count.”
    “Because the boy is immune to drugs and endures the Thee ‘C’ without a cry. I need a powerful ally whose interrogation school differs from ours.” Kahl replied honestly. And after a moment’s pause she added, “Besides, I like you admiral. Especially now.”
    “Your luck is double then… In this body I’m inclined to gamble,” Lemach turned to the desk, looked at some screen which was invisible to Kahl, touched the sensor and ordered: “Put the boy in_ the prison block under close supervision. The detainees are free to move around the base with no right to leave it. Arrange cabins for them.”
    He looked at Kahl again and noted:
    “That’s funny… especially the fact that Curtis sends his young son into space. I have good specialists. They will start working immediately. The boy will talk.”
    “Thank you, Lemach.” Kahl didn’t move.
    “I suppose, our strange alliance should be sealed with a small banquet,” the admiral raised his arms, “Would you like a candlelight dinner?”
    “I’d be glad to have one, as well as breakfast in bed,” Isabelle said sincerely feeling relaxed.

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