Thread: The translation from Russian to English

Проверьте пожалуйста текст на синтаксические и стилистические ошибки.

Once friends called Susan and Derek and invited them to dinner at a restaurant. Friends have not seen them very long time, but Susan bought tickets at a theater on the evening. They very wanted to watch the play, as Susan’s mother watched it already and advised them to watch it. Susan could get tickets because of someone got back them to theater’s booking-office. However, Susan and Derek greatly wanted to see their friend and came to agreement about a meeting in a bar at the theater.
They were speaking in an hour when Susan found out her handbag is disappeared. They told owner of the bar about happening. He was very upset and assured them, that is never happened before. Waiters searched the handbag everywhere but it didn’t search. Nobody saw the thief, no one returned the lost handbag to owner of the bar as well. Susan was very upset, as there were quite a few amount of money in the handbag. They made up their mind to go into the theater and to forget of the handbag at least a few hours. But turned out Susan put the tickets in the handbag and totally forgot about it.
By this time the play already started and they decided that go to the theater already late, the more so they did not have the tickets. They went to dinner with the friends. Even if someone found the handbag it was not delivered to a police station. After the dinner they went to the police. To Susan great surprise the handbag was there. The money and the tickets was in the handbag. It was picked up by a child on a street and given his parents who immediately delivered it to the police station.
At once Susan and Derek went to the theater and bought four most expensive tickets for next Sunday.

(Some things don't really make sense to me. And I'm afraid I might have polished it a bit too much in places, instead of just correcting the grammar.)


Once friends called Susan and Derek and invited them to dinner at a restaurant.

Old friends [maybe "former?" бывшие друзья ??] called Susan and Derek and invited them to a restaurant for dinner.

Friends have not seen them very long time, but Susan bought tickets at a theater on the evening.

The friends had not seen them in a very long time. Unfortunately, Susan already had theatre tickets for that evening.

They very wanted to watch the play, as Susan’s mother watched it already and advised them to watch it.

They [She and Derek] really wanted to go to the theatre, since Susan's mother had already seen the play and highly recommended it.

Susan could get tickets because of someone got back them to theater’s booking-office.

Susan was able to get tickets [this is all unclear] because she knew someone at the box-office.

However, Susan and Derek greatly wanted to see their friend and came to agreement about a meeting in a bar at the theater.

But they also wanted to see their friend [1 friend??] and decided to meet them in a bar at the theatre.

They were speaking in an hour when Susan found out her handbag is disappeared.

They chatted for an hour when Susan discovered her handbag had disappeared.

They told owner of the bar about happening. He was very upset and assured them, that is never happened before.

They told the owner of the bar. He was very upset and assured them that this had never happened before.

Waiters searched the handbag everywhere but it didn’t search.

Waiters searched everywhere, but couldn't find it.

Nobody saw the thief, no one returned the lost handbag to owner of the bar as well.

There was no sign of a thief and no one had turned a handbag in to the owner of the bar.

Susan was very upset, as there were quite a few amount of money in the handbag.

Susan was very upset. There was quite a bit of money in that purse.

They made up their mind to go into the theater and to forget of the handbag at least a few hours.

They decided to go into the theatre and put the incident out of their minds for a few hours.

But turned out Susan put the tickets in the handbag and totally forgot about it.

Unfortunately, Susan forgot that she had put the tickets into the handbag!

By this time the play already started and they decided that go to the theater already late, the more so they did not have the tickets.

By now, the play was well underway and they figured it was too late to go. Particularly since they didn't have tickets anyway.

They went to dinner with the friends.

They went out to eat with their friends.

Even if someone found the handbag it was not delivered to a police station.

If anyone found the handbag, they sure didn't turn it over to the police.

After the dinner they went to the police. To Susan great surprise the handbag was there.

After dinner, they went to the station. To Susan's great surprise — the handbag was there!

The money and the tickets was in the handbag.

The money and the tickets were still inside.

It was picked up by a child on a street and given his parents who immediately delivered it to the police station.

It had been picked up on the street by a child, who gave it to his parents. They immediately turned it over to the police.

At once Susan and Derek went to the theater and bought four most expensive tickets for next Sunday.

Susan and Derek immediately went to the theatre and bought four of the most expensive tickets for next Sunday.

[quote="Dr."]Проверьте пожалуйста текст на синтаксические и стилистические ошибки.

Once friends called Susan and Derek and invited them to dinner at a restaurant.

Some friends... When you say once I think you mean on one occassion; this doesn't need to be specified.

Friends have not seen them very long time, but Susan bought tickets at a theater on the evening.

Their friends had not seen them in a very long time and Susan had bought tickets for the theater that evening.

They very wanted to watch the play, as Susan’s mother watched it already and advised them to watch it.

They all very much wanted to see the play as Susan's mother had seen it and said that it was very good.
Note: you watch TV but you see a play or a movie

Susan could get tickets because of someone got back them to theater’s booking-office.

This sentence doesn't make any sense

Originally Posted by sperk

Originally Posted by Dr.

Susan could get tickets because of someone got back them to theater’s booking-office.

This sentence doesn't make any sense

Susan got tickets only because someone returned theirs to the theater's box-office.

So, the word "once" in the beginning of the sentence makes no sense in English, right? How would I translate "однажды"?

Однажды Сьюзан и Дереку позвонили друзья и пригласили их на ужин

Originally Posted by Indra

So, the word "once" in the beginning of the sentence makes no sense in English, right? How would I translate "однажды"?

Однажды Сьюзан и Дереку позвонили друзья и пригласили их на ужин

Однажды is one possible interpretation, but there are others. The problem is context:

"Once friends called Susan and Derek ... "

= Once upon a time, friends called ...
= At one time, friends called ...
= One-time friends of Susan and Derek called ...
= Former (no longer) friends called ...
= Friends from way back called ...
etc.

Judging by the rest of the story it APPEARS that they meant something like "Old friends, whom Susan and Derek hadn't seen in years, called them out of the blue on the very night they had tickets to see a show."

It's very common to start a story with однажды in Russian. How to rephrase the sentence to make it clear?

Well, you could actually put a comma after "once" and it would be grammatically correct. But it would sound awkward. You really have to say something like,
"Some old friends of Susan and Derek called and invited them to dinner."


I can't think of the equivolent for "однажды"

Всем огромное спасибо за помощь.

How about one day for однажды?

Однажды Сьюзан и Дереку позвонили друзья и пригласили их на ужин.

One day friends called Susan and Derek and invited them to a restaurant for dinner.

Originally Posted by Vadim84

How about one day for однажды?

Однажды Сьюзан и Дереку позвонили друзья и пригласили их на ужин.

One day friends called Susan and Derek and invited them to a restaurant for dinner.

yes, you could say that. Stylistically, this will sound like the beginning of a story or fairy tale.