I find it super-creepy when I speak on the phone with Americans and they start throwing around platitudes about "ma'am" and "have a nice day". While in many cases being totally unhelpful.

I am aware of this "grumpy" stereotype about Eastern and Northern Europeans, but it's basically false -- I don't think there is much difference in the actual help you get, just the way you get it.

I absolutely can't stand fake smiles!
Of course, I also don't like the uber-grumpy, almost angry stare you sometimes get by some Eastern Europeans when you enter a shop or something like that. But at least it's not fake. In my experience, once you start talking to the person they are perfectly nice and helpful. I don't need phony smiles. I don't get why it's such a big deal to Americans, for people to smile. Seems to me like many people are rude and arrogant, while smiling. I think phoniness is a lot worse than being reserved.

Only yesterday at work, I got a totally incompetent and unhelpful email starting by a long rant about how pleased the person was to be able to "assist me" and ending with "Have a great day!" When I got back to say that my question had not been answered, I got some useless nonsense back with yet another "Have a great day". What they really meant was obviously "P-ss off"! They had hardly bothered to read the information I provided, and certainly couldn't be bothered to answer the question.
But they could wish me a great day!

My real-life US experience is limited, but based on what I heard, I am sure I would just feel uneasy if waitresses were being overly friendly for the purpose of getting tips. IMO, they should be paid a living salary instead, so they can go about their job with a bit of dignity. From a waitress, I expect to be served food, not get a new friend, or cheer me up.

I hate it when I check into a hotel and staff rush to carry stuff I am perfectly capable of carrying myself, opening doors when it's not needed and things like this. I have no idea how to tip American style and it seems at many non-US hotels they are now expecting it. I prefer the old European style when you simply asked for the help you needed and everything was included in the bill.

Here in the UK I hate when people constantly ask "How are you?" despite the fact they usually couldn't care less. Definitely a cultural thing. It's like a mumbled greeting "yoallright?" and the only acceptable greeting is something similar back. It's also almost hilarious how English people are ALWAYS ready with some commentary on the weather, rather than just accepting 30 seconds of silence.