Thread: Universal human traits or culture differences?

Time after time reading some book on human nature by American author, I feel like I'm from Mars, and author is from Venus, so to speak.

Some of their examples are spot on, but some don't correspond to what I see in real life. Sometimes I wonder, whether some facts are really facts, or variation of the truth, which depends on the surroundings the author lives in.

for example, I've just read this:

When I wrote "You Just Don't Understand: Women and Men in Conversation" I didn’t know that what everyone would respond to most strongly is the question, “Why don’t men like to stop and ask for directions?” (Before the book was published, no one talked about this gender difference; as a result of the book, it is now the ubiquitous subject of jokes, cartoons, skits, greeting cards, and casual conversations.)
~ Dr. Deborah Tannen

Indeed, this argument is immortalized in dozens of Holliwood movies. I've read people joking about it. Technically I can explain why that (maybe) happens (striving to prove himself, dominant nature, etc.) But couldn't it be "nutured" to some extent? Yes, some people don't like to ask for directions (or for anything else, for that matter), but I didn't noticed any correlation between gender and this particular 'directions' quirk. In fact all male drivers I know have no problems with asking for directions (even without proding ).

But I can't know for sure, since I'm not a man. So the question arises: are men I know just not "manly" enough in that departmnet? Or it's some weird cultural difference which is elevated into absolute truth? What do you think?

Originally Posted by gRomoZeka

Time after time reading some book on human nature by an American author, I feel like I'm from Mars, and the author is from Venus, so to speak.

Shouldn't it be так?... Не?

Originally Posted by Оля

Shouldn't it be так?... Не?

Похоже на то.

I don't know about you guys, but I ask for directions ALL the time ))))

My brother and I* avoid it if we can. Our mom asks always and ever and she can even ask three or four people about the same direction, dispite the all answers she has already got.

There are several reasons I do not do it.
And yes, I noticed, men ask directions not so often as women do. People often ask me about direction and place, one time per week I suppose and they are mostly women. Two men I recall were the foreigners. One asked a yer ago and the another some weeks ago. Both were with their women, so it were couples, not just men.

Yesterday the women asked me about the name of the street, and about a month ago three different women asked me about three different directions just in five minutes.

*edited. Yaga б. спсб. за испр.!

The best example of a stubburn guy is Mozes who did 40years to find his way through the dessert.

euhm Mozes didn't we past this rock already?
Mozes: Shut up I know the way!



I don't like asking directions but sometimes you have to ask it to find the way.

Я обычно топографическим кретинизмом не страдаю и прекрасно ориентируюсь по карте. Хотя иногда, всё же, стоит спросить, например, когда я нашел нужный дом, но у него несколько строений (когда пишут д.5, стр. 8) - это обычно сберегает время.

Не вижу ничего зазорного спросить, если мне это действительно поможет. Обычно по словам я плохо ориентируюсь, поэтому в большинстве случаев избегаю спрашивать. В картах, кроме «Дубль ГИСа», мне проще запутаться, поэтому их совсем не люблю. А вообще у меня зрительная память работает, это лучший навигационный прибор... Если спросят «как пройти в библиотеку» расскажу да покажу как можно добраться восемьдесятью тремя способами и в зависимости от погодных условий и курса доллара. Единственная проблема — если мне не нужно помнить маршрут, я его быстро забываю. Когда я последний раз был в Москве, мужчины у меня спрашивали, где здесь туалет периодичностью в одну минуту. Серьёзно!

It might be a vaguely true generalization that women are more likely to ask for directions, but this sort of discussion is a PC way of discussing differences between the sexes. If you say men are better than women in science you get fired like the president of Harvard.

Originally Posted by Malinwa

The best example of a stubburn guy is Mozes who did 40years to find his way through the dessert.

euhm Mozes didn't we past this rock already?
Mozes: Shut up I know the way!

Originally Posted by Leof

Me and my brother avoid it if we can.

My brother and I avoid it if we can.

I think it is a cultural "macho" thing- I can't tell you how many times we have taken "the scenic route" (meaning the wrong way) because my husband got lost and decided to wing it instead of just stopping and asking directions. My father was the same, my brother is also the same.

I (American female) however, stop and ask directions as soon as I know I have a problem. Perhaps it is a time issue: I don't have time to waste taking "scenic routes" so I ask. After 25 years of marriage, I do the driving now if we are in a hurry :P

I think it comes from the same part of the male brain that does not want to ask for help in fixing that leaky pipe... "No, no, we don't need to call a plumber- I can do it, just hand me that big wrench over there... oops!"

I could not say for sure if it is cultural or male-specific, but judging from what I see in the news, I doubt this is just an American trait. It must be genetic, however- the sons of men who cannot ask directions also seem to exhibit the same illness

seem to exhibit the same illness

This is no illness - this is a device that helped mankind spread across the Earth.

Originally Posted by E-learner

seem to exhibit the same illness

This is not illness - this is a device that helped mankind spread across the Earth.

А-ха-ха-ха-хах! 5 баллов!!!

for what its worth, i am a serial direction asker. i quite often have to ask for directions when finding stuff in moscow. in fact once, i was in a scenario (i sometimes find that i get told one thing, go there, ask again and get pointed in the direction i just came from) where i asked at least 7 people where an address was and ended up teaming up with some other guy who was looking for the same place. not the first time either, almost happened today as well