Thread: Facebook Parenting: For the Troubled Teen or Angry dad shoots laptop

I had thought about posting this one last week and just didn't get around to it. Now I see that there has been more follow-up to the story over the weekend, with "according to the Los Angeles Times. During the visit, a social worker reviewed some parenting tips while the officers allegedly congratulated him for a lesson well taught." So for those of you who were not one of the 24 MILLION to have watched this video:



It is of a North Carolina dad who decided hand out a very public punishment to his rebellious and disrespectful 15 year-old daughter.

Jordan posted on his Facebook wall that he'd do the whole thing over again, though with a few minor tweaks: He'd ditch the cigarette, retract calling his daughter and "ass," change hats and shine his boots. Otherwise, he stands by his actions.

NBC's "Today" polled readers on the incident and reported that 74 percent agreed with Jordan's actions.

I do admire the way he is handling the press and not going on all the talk shows:

While we appreciate the interest you're all putting forth to get in touch with us regarding the video, we're not going to go on your talk show, not going to call in to your radio show, and not going to be in your TV mini-series.


Some of you think I made an acceptable parenting decision and others think I didn't. However, I can't think of any way myself or my daughter can ...respond to a media outlet that won't be twisted out of context. The Dallas news TV news already showed that in their brief 5 minute interview with the psychologist.

Additionally, there's absolutely NO way I'm going to send my child the message that it's OK to gain from something like this. It would send her a message that it's OK to profit at the expense of someone else's embarrassment or misfortune and that's now how I was raised, nor how she has been raised.

So I say thank you from all of us. If we have anything to say, we'll say it here on Facebook, and we'll say it publicly, but we won't say it to a microphone or a camera. There are too many other REAL issues out there that could use this attention you're giving us. My daughter isn't hurt, emotionally scarred, or otherwise damaged, but that kind of publicity has never seemed to be to have a positive effect on any child or family.

If you're a news outlet that wants to ask us a question, feel free to so via email. I'm sure by now my email address is easy enough to find. It might take me awhile to get to a response because I'd have to sort through the "Die you bastard" emails to find it, but we will respond if its something that we feel merits it. Otherwise, sorry... no interviews, no talk shows, no call-ins.

If we respond to anything, it will be on here, and it will be in a way that our words can't be misconstrued or edited for appeal to specific audience or shock value.Now, I'm going to try to get to work for the day.

Best of luck to all of you out there... and PLEASE give my phone a break."

Anyway, there have been LOTS of going back an forth on this one as to if the dad did the right thing or not. Some people believe he did the right thing but that his daughter probably hates him even more. It seems that most of the people who think he is wrong are other teens.

I watched it the other day. Disgusting on both sides if what he says about her fb page is true. they deserve each other.

Can anyone tell me why everybody is so fascinated, obsessed even, with Facebook? I looked at it once or twice, once I even went as far as creating an account (I think it still exists there), but I just cannot understand why do I need one. What am I supposed to post there and what am I supposed to read there? Am I missing something?

Would it have drawn such a wide response if the guy just grounded his daughter forbidding her to use a laptop or giving it to charity? I doubt it. So what is it all really about?

He seems to be a pretty strict parent (at least from a teenager's point of view), on the other hand his demands are not unreasonable, even if some parents demand less. Shooting a laptop is extreme, and a waste of a perfectly good laptop (*sighs* ), but as a person who actually paid for it he is in his right, sort of. The girl's post is whiny and disrespectful, but teens rant about their parents all the time, so I'm not going there - we know to little of the situation to judge her character.

So.. we have a guy who "punished" his daughter for talking disrespectfully about her family behind his back. It's not really sensational. ))
BTW, why there was a need for a social worker's visit? It's just scary how the state pokes its nose into everything there. =|

Ramil - for me, Facebook is a nexus for sharing ideas. I have around 1500 friends from all over the world and I talk with them constantly, to find out how people feel in every country. I have friends in Russia, Israel, Iran, even Palestinian friends and I listen to all of them. As a result, I feel a million times more informed than those who rely on "news" for information.

Informed of popular rumors, eh? (Remember our chat about 95% These things amplify in Facebook, I think).

Besides, why Facebook? Why is it always Facebook?

Originally Posted by Ramil

Informed of popular rumors, eh? (Remember our chat about 95% [IMG]file:///C:\Users\Owner\AppData\Local\Temp\msohtmlclip1\01\ clip_image001.gif[/IMG] These things amplify in Facebook, I think).Besides, why Facebook? Why is it always Facebook?

In our "family" hubby and I don't use Facebook and our girls only use it a little. My sister and cousins use it much more. My dad actually found out about his brother being taken and admitted to the hospital via a Facebook posting by my cousin instead of a phone call or even text message!

I know that for "networking" it is a great resource. A number of organizations and/or business will post information up on their Facebook page before they send out emails or post information on their Websites. A number of artists have "Fan" pages and will post new songs there before even posting them on YouTube or iTunes. Also with school work I know of teachers who will establish a class page or the students will establish a class page to exchange information about homework, lessons and ask questions. Companies have responded very quickly to complaints posted on their Facebook pages. I know a local chain of diners and people complained about how two of their stores closed right after the holidays without any notice The store posted information about why they didn't give notice, i.e. heath and safety issues and if anyone had purchased a gift card and wanted a refund how they could obtained one. They have also directly responded to other customer complaints posted on their "Fan" page and they are not the only company doing this. It really can be a very valuable tool.

Now one thing I didn't think about or even consider was something I heard last night. They say that the days of a paper resume are going away and that employer will ONLY use online information about you during the pre-hiring process. They will "Google" your name and if you don't have an online presence, you're not going to be hirable. You need to be in Linkedin and Google+ and have a CLEAN Facebook page.

As for a number of "teenagers" they are done with Facebook and have moved onto Tumblr.

As for the everyday person, Facebook has become a digital diary. They post all these uncensored thoughts and feelings for the entire world to know about. Which is rather funny as many Americans are all upset about privacy issues and yet they are more than willing to post on Facebook every single personal detail, photos and videos... that will never be private again.

That can be dangerous, by the way. People just don't think when posting something (and the video above is a proof to that). If someone's boss visit his employee's page and read something about himself things would go awkward. It is a very convenient instrument for police to track down people's connections to each other and opens a whole new world of possible abuses.
There's been already several cases when the posts in Facebook ruined careers. There is way too much personal information out there in the open. What surprises me the most is that people share it willingly... I just hope they won't regret about it later.

Originally Posted by gRomoZeka

So.. we have a guy who "punished" his daughter for talking disrespectfully about her family behind his back. It's not really sensational. ))
BTW, why there was a need for a social worker's visit? It's just scary how the state pokes its nose into everything there. =|

I believe the social worker paid the visit because they were concerned about the dad having the gun and tempers being so high on both sides. I believe they wanted to make certain the daughter had not been hurt and that both sides could maybe "talk" and use "words" to express their anger with each other.

Originally Posted by Ramil

Informed of popular rumors, eh? (Remember our chat about 95% These things amplify in Facebook, I think).

Besides, why Facebook? Why is it always Facebook?

On the contrary, I find that most people are honest and try to tell the truth. Yes, people become inflamed and argue about many different issues - but in these debates, I find that I learn a great deal about how others see the world.

For me, it isn't only Facebook. I am also on VK now. But I have the most activity on Facebook because I have been on there for a few years and most of my friends from life are on there too. So I like to catch up on news with them and see how they are doing from time to time. On Facebook, I can find out at any time how my friends are doing.

Originally Posted by Deborski

I find that most people are honest and try to tell the truth

Yes, try to. But where do they get the facts?

Yes, try to. But where do they get the facts?

I don't worry too much about it, because most of them speak from their own personal experience. I would rather hear the personal experience of individual people, than whatever nonsense our media propagates.

Oh, if that's a personal experience, it's ok then. As long as it remains just first-hand. But I often see how people mindlessly repost some idiotic rumors claiming them to be 100% accurate.

Nah, I don't pay attention too much to rumors. When people start quoting "facts" or regurgitating rhetoric, I just ignore it mostly. Sometimes, I may google their supposed "facts" to see if there is something to it. But I generally don't pay much attention to that. Personal feelings, experiences, those things matter to me!

Oh, I watched "You Have 0 Friends" episode of "South Park", very funny!
I too was sitting for a while in front of blank facebook page, and, in the end, it turned out, that I had no ideas to share with the unknowns.