# Forum General General Discussion  Fire!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

## Gordon Freeman

A game. There is a text with lots of mistakes, LOTS! Then the first player correct the mistake in 30 seconds, then the next one and so on. The game starts when the text is posted. It'd be better to prepair all the players befor the game. They would take there numbers and start the game. If somebody don't post the correction in 30 seconds he loses. This game is expected to improve people's language, I think it's just interesting!

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## Chuvak

> A game. There is a text with lots of mistakes, LOTS! Then the first player correct the mistake in 30 seconds, then the next one and so on. The game starts when the text is posted. It'd be better to prepair all the players befor the game. They would take there numbers and start the game. If somebody don't post the correction in 30 seconds he loses. This game is expected to improve people's language, I think it's just interesting!

 I think its a great idea, but who will correct me, if i play with a man who isnt a native speaker as i am???

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## Gordon Freeman

Ok, actually, the next person will find the wrong correction. At the end of game everyone posts his text with only his correction and the corrections before. He underline his correction. That's why all the people can find the wrong correction!

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## basurero

I'm not sure I get it. I am a native English speaker and I write a message in English with deliberate mistakes and the Russians must try to correct it, is that what you mean? 
Ok 
Once apon a time there was a man who loved to go into fights. This was very badly for his health, however. One day he were at the bar and he was talking to a sexie girl but the girl had boyfriend and the boyfriend attached him and punched his ugly face. His nose was shattering instantly and to him it was needed to go to hospital for much months for that, in order to recovered.  
There are about 10 mistakes. Only Russians are allowed to try.

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## TATY

> A game. There is a text with lots of mistakes, LOTS! Then the first player corrects the first mistake in 30 seconds, then the next one and so on. The game starts when the text is posted. It'd be better to prepair all the players before the game. They would take their numbers and start the game. If somebody doesn't post the correction in 30 seconds he loses. This game is designed / intended to improve people's language, I think it's just interesting!

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## kalinka_vinnie

> A game. There is a text with lots of mistakes, LOTS! Then the first player correct the mistake in 30 seconds, then the next one and so on. The game starts when the text is posted. It'd be better to prepair all the players befor the game. They would take there numbers and start the game. If somebody don't post the correction in 30 seconds he loses. This game is expected to improve people's language, I think it's just interesting!

 30 seconds? What do you think the average reply time is on this forum? We don't have all day, eyes glued to the forum, to wait for someone to post something!   ::

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## Ramil

> I'm not sure I get it. I am a native English speaker and I write a message in English with deliberate mistakes and the Russians must try to correct it, is that what you mean? 
> Ok 
> Once upon a time there was a man who had loved to go into fights. This was very badxx for his health, however. One day he was in the bar and he was talking to a sexy girl but the girl had a boyfriend and the boyfriend (had?)attacked him and punched his ugly face. His nose was shattering instantly and to him it was needed to go to hospital for many months for that, in order to recoverxx.  
> There are about 10 mistakes. Only Russians are allowed to try.

 Well how did I do?

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## basurero

Quite well but there are a few more mistakes in there. Some are not technically mistakes but sound retarded. Have another look.

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## Ramil

> Quite well but there are a few more mistakes in there. Some are not technically mistakes but sound retarded. Have another look.

 What is "sound retarded"?

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## basurero

It sounds like something a person with severe mental disabilities would say. It might be offensive to certain sensitive politically correct people.

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## Ramil

> It sounds like something a person with severe mental disabilities would say. It might be offensive to certain sensitive politically correct people.

 Really I have no idea what are you talking about. Did I get it right that text contains some phrases/words which may offend some "politically correct people" because of the mispronunciation? Or is it "baby-talk"?

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## basurero

No! Lol. The word "retarded" can be offensive to some people.  
In the text there are some things which you missed, but not all of them are grammatically incorrect (probably), but rather they sound stupid.

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## Ramil

Once upon a time there was a man who had loved to go into fights. This was very bad for his health, however.  
My version:
One day he was in the bar talking to a sexy girl who happenned to have a boyfriend. That boyfriend of hers had attacked him by punching his ugly face shattering his nose instantly. He had to go to a hospital for many months to recover. 
Original:
One day he was in the bar and he was talking to a sexy girl but the girl had a boyfriend and the boyfriend (had?)attacked him and punched his ugly face. His nose was shattering instantly and to him it was necessary to go to hospital for many months for that, in order to recover. 
How is that?

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## Chuvak

All right!!! on behalf of myself let me write a text which I invented and which contains at least 10 mistakes  
Вчера вечером я пошел на магазин и видел там человека, которая меня вчера обманул. Я решил его проучить и подойдя поближе, ударял кулаком в лицо со словами "Получи скотина, еще хочешь, а?" Но он оказывался тоже не промах - быстро придя на себя после своего удара, он схватил меня за руку и повалил на пол. Тут в магазин приходила полиция, которая немедленно среагировав задерживала нас обоих и доставляла в отделение. Я получил 15 суток а мой коллега по несчастью предстал перед судом на то, что обманул меня! 
(10 errors)!!!

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## basurero

Here is what I had in mind at the beginning.   

> Once upon a time there was a man who xx loved to get into fights. This was very bad for his health, however.  
> One day he was in the bar xxx talking to a sexy girl but the girl had a boyfriend and the boyfriend attacked him and punched his ugly face. His nose was shattered instantly and he had to go to the hospital for many months for xx to recover. 
> How is that?

 Now your version.   

> My version:
> One day he was in the bar talking to a sexy girl who happenned to have a boyfriend. That boyfriend of hers xxx attacked him by punching his ugly face, shattering his nose instantly. He had to go to the hospital for many months to recover.

 Your version is actually better than my original.   ::

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## Ramil

> All right!!! on behalf of myself let me write a text which I invented and which contains at least 10 mistakes  
> Вчера вечером я пошел на магазин и видел там человека, которая меня вчера обманул. Я решил его проучить и подойдя поближе, ударял кулаком в лицо со словами "Получи скотина, еще хочешь, а?" Но он оказывался тоже не промах - быстро придя на себя после своего удара, он схватил меня за руку и повалил на пол. Тут в магазин приходила полиция, которая немедленно среагировав задерживала нас обоих и доставляла в отделение. Я получил 15 суток а мой коллега по несчастью предстал перед судом на то, что обманул меня! 
> (10 errors)!!!

 Если принимать во внимание пунктуацию - в частности запятые и двоеточия, то ошибок гораздо больше. А отсутствие запятых вокруг деепричастия или деепричастного оборота считается довольно грубой ошибкой, которая иногда может исказить смысл предложения. 
1st sentence - 3 errors + 1 (choice of words)
2nd sentence - 1 comma, 1 colon, 1 error + 1 (choice of words)
3rd sentence - 2 errors + 1 comma
4th sentence - 3 errors + 2 commas
5th sentence - 1 error + 1 comma

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## Chuvak

One day he was in the bar and he was talking to a sexy girl but the girl had a boyfriend and the boyfriend (had?)attacked him and punched his ugly face. His nose was shattering instantly and to him it was necessary to go to hospital for many months for that, in order to recover.  
One day he dropped in the bar and started talking to a fuc*en beautifil chick who unfortunalely had a boyfriend. The motherfuc*er approached the guy and punched his fuck*n face with his fist!!! His nose was smashed instantly and blood started running out of he wound. in order to fuck*n recover he fuck*n had to fuck*n go to fuck*n hospital!!! It was a great fuc*up for him!!!

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## basurero

Wow, this looks hard. My attempt:   

> Вчера вечером я пошел в магазин и увидел там человека, который меня вчера обманул. Я решил его проучить и подоходя поближе, ударил кулаком в лицо со словами "Получи скотина, еще хочешь, а?" Но он оказывался тоже не промах - быстро придя на себя после своего удара, он схватил меня за руку и повалил на пол. Тут в магазине пришла полиция, которая немедленно среагировав задерживала нас обоих и доставляла в отделение. Я получил 15 суток а моя коллега по несчастью предстала перед судом за то, что обманул меня! 
> (10 errors)!!!

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## Chuvak

Basurero!!! Could you check my try!
And I want to see how you correct my Russian text!!!!  ::

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## basurero

> One day he dropped into the bar and started talking to a fuc*en beautiful chick who unfortunately had a boyfriend. The motherfuc*er approached the guy and punched his @@@@*n face with his fist!!! His nose was smashed instantly and blood started running out of the wound. in order to @@@@*n recover he @@@@*n had to @@@@*n go to @@@@*n hospital!!! It was a great fuc*up for him!!!

 That's f**cken awesome! F**ken good job mate! (I think those were typos)  ::   ::   ::

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## Chuvak

> Wow, this looks hard. My attempt:        Originally Posted by Chuvak  Вчера вечером я пошел в магазин и увидел там человека, который меня вчера обманул. Я решил его проучить и подоходя поближе, ударил кулаком в лицо со словами "Получи скотина, еще хочешь, а?" Но он оказывался тоже не промах - быстро придя на себя после своего удара, он схватил меня за руку и повалил на пол. Тут в магазине пришла полиция, которая немедленно среагировав задерживала нас обоих и доставляла в отделение. Я получил 15 суток а моя коллега по несчастью предстала перед судом за то, что обманул меня! 
> (10 errors)!!!

 Коллега - masculine!!!
There are some errors you didnt correct. Tell me when you give up!!!

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## Chuvak

Here is the correct version (I looked thought it many times, so that It's absolutely correct (dont ever doubt)!!!) (but maybe some commas being missed) Вчера вечером я пошел в магазин и увидел там человека, который меня вчера обманул. Я решил его проучить и, подойдя поближе, ударил кулаком в лицо со словами "Получи скотина, еще хочешь, а?" Но он оказался тоже не промах - быстро придя в себя после своего удара, он схватил меня за руку и повалил на пол. Тут в магазин пришла полиция, которая немедленно среагировав задержала нас обоих и доставила в отделение. Я получил 15 суток а мой коллега по несчастью предстал перед судом за то, что обманул меня!  
I wanna see another english story to correct !!!

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## basurero

> Вчера вечером я пошел в магазин и увидел там человека, который меня вчера обманул. Я решил его проучить и подоходя поближе, ударил его кулаком на лицо со словами "Получи, скотина, еще хочешь, а?" Но он оказывался тоже не промах - быстро придя на себя после своего удара, он схватил меня за руку и повалил на пол.(I don't understand this sentance ) Тут в магазине пришла полиция, которая, немедленно среагировав задержала нас обоих и доставила в отделение. Я получил 15 суток, а мой коллега по несчастью предстал перед судом за то, что он обманул меня!

 Lol, now I give up.   ::

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## Ramil

> Wow, this looks hard. My attempt:   _Вчера_ вечером я пошел в магазин и увидел там человека, который меня _вчера_ обманул.

 The second word вчера should be replaced with "накануне". (the day before - i think such a replacement is valid in English too)   

> Я решил его проучить и ,подойдя поближе, ударил _(его)_ кулаком в лицо со словами: "Получи скотина, еще хочешь, а?" Но он оказался тоже не промах - быстро придя в себя после  моего удара, он схватил меня за руку и повалил на пол. Тут в магазине появилась полиция, которая, немедленно среагировав, задержала нас обоих и доставила в отделение.

 either "в магазине появилась полиция" 
or "в магазин пришла полиция"   

> Я получил 15 суток, а мой коллега по несчастью предстал перед судом за то, что обманул меня! 
> (10 errors)!!!

 The gender of the word коллега varies in dependence of the noun it references. Here коллега по несчастью is masculine because we're talking about the man who had deceived the author.

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## Chuvak

> Here is the correct version (I looked thought it many times, so that It's absolutely correct (dont ever doubt)!!!) (but maybe some commas being missed) Вчера вечером я пошел в магазин и увидел там человека, который меня вчера обманул. Я решил его проучить и, подойдя поближе, ударил кулаком в лицо со словами "Получи скотина, еще хочешь, а?" Но он оказался тоже не промах - быстро придя в себя после моего удара, он схватил меня за руку и повалил на пол. Тут в магазин пришла полиция, которая немедленно среагировав задержала нас обоих и доставила в отделение. Я получил 15 суток а мой коллега по несчастью предстал перед судом за то, что обманул меня!  
> I wanna see another english story to correct !!!

 Но он оказался тоже не промах - быстро придя в себя после моего удара, он схватил меня за руку и повалил на пол.
I'll explain you
Он оказался тоже не промах (Its idiomatic expression, means that He isnt a foolish, silly man, that He can stand for himself, and beat anyone who want to beat him!!!)
Придти в себя (Its another idiomatic expression, means "to recover from something (from a punch in this example)")
Повалить на пол (Means make him fall on the floor)!!!

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## Ramil

> Но он оказывался тоже не промах - быстро придя на себя после своего удара, он схватил меня за руку и повалил на пол.(I don't understand this sentance )

 but he had appeared to be nobody's fool - having quickly recovered from my punch he seized my hand and floored me.

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## basurero

Next story: 
After this nonfortunate even, the man decided that he oughted to change his way. So he goed to a anger manajment class inorder to learn how to restrain the burning rage which would quiet frequently explode within him. At his first class however, his teacher calls him a "fatso" so he got raged and choocked his out of the window of the classroom. The man had landed in a pricklish bush.  
About 15 mistakes.

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## Chuvak

> Next story: 
> After this unfortunate event, the man decided that he should change his life. So he went to an anger management class in order to learn how to restrain the burning rage which used to frequently explode within him. At his first class however, his teacher called him a "fatso" and he instantly got raged and chocked him out of the classroom's window. The man landed in a prickly bush.  (He tried to call the police but noone could hear him because he had pricked his tongue and it didnt work properly. He endeavoured to stand up, but at that very moment he felt a pot landed on his head. He fainted and has never recovered so far!!!) 
> About 15 mistakes.

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## basurero

Very good.   

> Originally Posted by basurero  Next story: 
> After this unfortunate event, the man decided that he should change his life. So he went to an anger management class in order to learn how to restrain the burning rage which used to frequently explode within him. At his first class however, his teacher called him a "fatso" and he instantly got angry/flew into a rage and chucked him out of the classroom's window _(better: classroom window)._ The man landed in a prickly bush.  (He tried to call the police but noone could hear him because he had pricked his tongue and it didnt work properly. He endeavoured to stand up, but at that very moment he felt a pot land on his head. He fainted and hasn't recovered as of yet/yet!!!)
> About 15 mistakes.

 Note, there were somethings you changed which were not incorrect to start with, or that you changed in an way I didn't expect. The way you said is correct too though. 
that he ought to change his ways 
to learn how to restrain the burning rage which would quite frequently explode within him

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## Chuvak

I think Its intreresting and veru usefull exercise!!! I will write to you another part of this amaizing story:
1. Однако смерть преподаватель не успокоил наш бесстрашного искателя приключений. 2. Осознав, что теперь он не только драчун и еще и убийца (что, согласитесь, далеко не одно не то-же), мужик решил, что пора делать ноги и сваливать на бугор (о Новую Зеландию например). 3. За несчастье у него не оказался над рукой загран пасспорта, и он решил захватить самолета. 4. Разоружившись пистолет, пулеметом, двумя гранатометами и ядерной бомба, киллер смелый ринулся в аэропорт, уничтожал из гранатомета некоторую охрану, подходил к самолету, и, объявив, что самолет захвачивается, начал задвигать свои требования! 
I know Its hard, but you should do it!!!
1. - 3
2. - 2
3. - 5
4. - 9 (Its soooo hard, but try!!!)

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## basurero

1. Однако, смерть преподавателя не успокоила нашего бесстрашного искателя приключений. 2. Осознав, что теперь он не только драчун и еще и убийца (что, согласитесь, далеко не одно и тоже), мужик решил, что пора делать _ноги и сваливать на бугор(eh??)_ (о Новой Зеландии, например). 3. По несчастью, у него не оказался над рукой _за гран пасспорта(ｗｔｆ？：））_, и он решил захватить самолет. 4. Разоружившись пистолетом, пулеметом, двумя гранатометами и ядерной бомбой, киллер смело ринулся в аэропорт, уничтожил из гранатомета несколько орхан, подошел к самолету, и, объявив, что самолет захвачивался, начал задвигать свои требования!  
That was hard as!  ::

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## Ramil

> 1. Однако, смерть преподавателя не успокоила нашего бесстрашного искателя приключений.

 Correct   

> 2. Осознав, что теперь он не только драчун, но еще и убийца (что, согласитесь, далеко не одно и то _(space here)_ же), мужик решил, что пора делать _ноги и сваливать за бугор(eh??)_

 Делать ноги = убегать (to scram, to shove off, to rabbit, to get the hell out) 
Сваливать за бугор = бежать за границу.   

> (в Новую Зеландию, например). 3. По несчастью, у него не оказалось под рукой _за гран пасспорта(wtf?)_, и он решил захватить самолет.

 загран. паспорта = заграничного паспорта
(в разговоре иногда соединяют эти два слова и получается _загранпаспорт_)   

> 4. Вооружившись пистолетом, пулеметом, двумя гранатометами и ядерной бомбой, киллер смело ринулся в аэропорт, уничтожил из гранатомета несколько орханников, 
> подошел к самолету, и, объявив, что самолет захвачивался, начал задвигать свои требования!

 и, объявив, что замолёт захвачен, начал выдвигать свои требования.

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## flowforever

уничтожил из гранатомета несколько охранников

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## Ramil

> уничтожил из гранатомета несколько охранников

 Ы!  :: 
Missed that one. But it must be a typo. 
I would say "уничтожил из гранатомёта нескольких охранников" 
А вообще - "уничтожил из гранатомёта всю охрану" because if he had not killed all guardsmen they would probably kill him. 
I wonder whether the last sentence is grammatically correct. (I mean the English one)

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## Chuvak

> 1. Однако, смерть преподавателя не успокоила нашего бесстрашного искателя приключений. 2. Осознав, что теперь он не только драчун и еще и убийца (что, согласитесь, далеко не одно и тоже), мужик решил, что пора делать _ноги и сваливать на бугор(eh??)_ (о Новой Зеландии, например). 3. По несчастью, у него не оказался над рукой _за гран пасспорта(ｗｔｆ？：））_, и он решил захватить самолет. 4. Разоружившись пистолетом, пулеметом, двумя гранатометами и ядерной бомбой, киллер смело ринулся в аэропорт, уничтожил из гранатомета несколько орхан, подошел к самолету, и, объявив, что самолет захвачивался, начал задвигать свои требования!  
> That was hard as!

 Basurero!!1 Well done!!!
But there are some errors you havent noticed:
Однако, смерть преподавателя не успокоила нашего бесстрашного искателя приключений. 2. Осознав, что теперь он не только драчун но еще и убийца (что, согласитесь, далеко не одно и тоже), мужик решил, что пора делать ноги и сваливать на бугор (в Новую Зеландию например). 3. К несчастью, у него не оказалось под рукой загран пасспорта, и он решил захватить самолет. 4. Вооружившись пистолетом, пулеметом, двумя гранатометами и ядерной бомбой, киллер смело ринулся в аэропорт, уничтожил из гранатомета всю охрану or несколько охранников, подошел к самолету, и, объявив, что самолет захвачен, начал выдвигать свои требования!   
I'm waiting for you continuing the story!!!

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## Ramil

OK. New one
Note: some words are deliberately misspelled 
Спустя трицать лет, седым стариком и при больных лёгких он, прихрамываясь, вышел из-за ворота окружной тюрмы в сопровожении охраника. Яркое сонце выбило слезу из-под глазу самого старого зека этой тюрьмы. Возможно, это было не токо сонце - здесь, за воротами нему вдруг стало страшно выходить на свободу в мир, который успел забывать о нём, как мы забывали свои децкие кашмары. 
Comments:
зек = заключённый

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## basurero

> OK. New one
> Note: some words are deliberately misspelled 
> Спустя трицать лет, седым стариком и при больных лёгких он, прихрамываясь, вышел из-за ворот окруженной тюрьмы с сопровождением охранника. Яркое солнце выбило слезу из-под глаз самого старого зека этой тюрьмы. Возможно, это было не только солнце - здесь, за воротами нему вдруг стало страшно выходить на свободу в мире, который успел забывать о нём, как мы забывали свои детские кошмары.
> Comments:
> зек = заключённый

 правильно?  ::

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## adoc

Jeez... I hope I didnt make a mistake... Something feasible next time? 
Спустя тридцать лет, седым стариком и при больных лёгких, он, прихрамывая, вышел за ворота окружной тюрьмы в сопровождении охранника. Яркое солнце выбило слезу из глаз самого старого зека этой тюрьмы. Возможно, это было не только солнце - здесь, за воротами, ему вдруг стало страшно выходить на свободу в мир, который успел забыть о нём, как мы забыли свои детские кошмары. 
btw паспорт is with one "c"

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## kalinka_vinnie

Ounce apon the time, there was a large big cactus with the name Kak-Tus. It was a genitle cactus with long nidles. One day he was standing around a dessert, of all places, and was thinking to himselvessesss: "What am I doing here? Maybe I should go and seek riches and other wonderful things in distant lands not native too me?". The answer to the last queston was simple and very eloquent: "No." The reasoning being that his roots were stuck in a sand and he could not move. The naked trooth killed him instantely. However, the millisecond before he daid, he had one last thought: "I love the Swedish culture". This was the gratest thing any plant had ever thunked. 
Tha and.

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## Kirill2142

Once upon a time, there was a large big cactus with the name Kak-Tus. It was a gentle cactus with long needles. One day he was standing in the desert, of all places  ::  , and was thinking to himself: "What am I doing here? Maybe I should go and seek riches and other wonderful things in distant lands not native to me?". The answer to the last question was simple and very eloquent: "No." The reason was that his roots were stuck in a sand and he could not move. The naked truth killed him instantly. However, the millisecond before he died, he had last thought: "I love Swedish culture". This was the greatest thing any plant had ever thought. The end

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## Chuvak

> Once upon a time, there was a large big cactus named Kak-Tus. It was the gentle cactus with the long needles. One day he was standing in the desert, of all places  , and was thinking to himself: "What am I doing here? Maybe I should go and seek riches and other wonderful things in distant lands not native to me?". The answer to the last question was simple and very eloquent: "No." The reason was that his roots were stuck in the sand and he could not move. The naked truth killed him instantly. However, the millisecond before he died, he had last thought: "I love Swedish culture". This was the greatest thing any plant had ever thought of. The end

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## Chuvak

При одной заброшенной тюрьма приседал один покинутый всеми человек, который оказался там из-за судебной ошибки. Он все приседал и думал о том как хорошо должно быть в свободе, между друзей, родных да и просто незнакомых люди. А думала он так потому, что сидела в одиночной маленькой камере, на света и тепла, еду приносили дерьмовую, а вместо чая - кипяток в ведро. И вот однажды он понимал, что нет в мире правосудия, что все, что называется законом - бессмысленно и глупо. И порешил он с того момента сделать ноги. Как - да очень просто, за промежуток времени между вечерней проверка и закрытием дверей в камеры должен было успеть проскользнуть между охрана и пристроиться сзади за грузовиком вывозящим мусор от тюрьмы, который всегда на это время там стоял и ожидал открытия дверей. Так он и сделал, и в результате оказался свободе, правда без документов и без дома. Но это все мелочи для человека у которого цель !! 
Try this!!! Its hard!!!

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## Ramil

> Jeez... I hope I didnt make a mistake... Something feasible next time? 
> Спустя тридцать лет, седым стариком и с больными лёгкими, он, прихрамывая, вышел за ворота окружной тюрьмы в сопровождении охранника. Яркое солнце выбило слезу из глаз самого старого зека этой тюрьмы. Возможно, это было не только солнце - здесь, за воротами, ему вдруг стало страшно выходить на свободу, в мир, который успел забыть о нём, как мы забываем свои детские кошмары. 
> btw паспорт is with one "c"

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## adoc

> Originally Posted by adoc  Jeez... I hope I didnt make a mistake... Something feasible next time? 
>  как мы забываем свои детские кошмары.

 This is not a correction.  You can say it both ways.  In fact, if you are no longer a child, your version doesnt make much sense. Change детские to ночные, and then the sentence is alright. There are other stylistic issues as well that I wouldn't comment on.   
Again, при больных лёгких may not be the most elegant Russian, but it is colloquially acceptable, and the fragment uses  colloquialisms, so it is not completely out of place. 
Ramil, please, next time, not something this dubious.  Did you pull it out of a fiction book?  It's a little hard to guess stylistic preferences of fiction writers.

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## Ramil

> Originally Posted by Ramil        Originally Posted by adoc  Jeez... I hope I didnt make a mistake... Something feasible next time? 
>  как мы забываем свои детские кошмары.   This is not a correction.  You can say it both ways.  In fact, if you are no longer a child, your version doesnt make much sense. Change детские to ночные, and then the sentence is alright. There are other stylistic issues as well that I wouldn't comment on.     I just typed the correct version, saved it and then added mistakes. Latest post - just the saved original. Perhaps I went too far in making mistakes  
> It's kinda hard. To make deliberate mistakes, i mean.     
> 			
> 				Again, при больных лёгких may not be the most elegant Russian, but it is colloquially acceptable, and the fragment uses  colloquialisms, so it is not completely out of place.
> 			
> 		  Well, I agree, but it's better to say с больными лёгкими, than при больных лёгких. 
> [quote:3us4cjv5]
> Ramil, please, next time, not something this dubious.  Did you pull it out of a fiction book?  It's a little hard to guess stylistic preferences of fiction writers.

 [/quote:3us4cjv5] 
It came out of my head. Maybe I'll write some book  ::

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## adoc

Maybe you should   ::

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## kalinka_vinnie

> Originally Posted by Kirill2142  Once upon a time, there was a large big cactus named Kak-Tus. It was the gentle cactus with the long needles. One day he was standing in the desert, of all places  , and was thinking to himself: "What am I doing here? Maybe I should go and seek riches and other wonderful things in distant lands not native to me?". The answer to the last question was simple and very eloquent: "No." The reason was that his roots were stuck in the sand and he could not move. The naked truth killed him instantly. However, the millisecond before he died, he had last thought: "I love Swedish culture". This was the greatest thing any plant had ever thought of. The end

 Chuvak, you only got ONE correct error-fix, the rest are wrong!  ::  
Good job Kirill! 
By the way, you guys missed the biggest error of them all! I am very disappointed, it is so obvious! The very last sentence: 
Once upon a time, there was a large (delete: big) cactus with the name Kak-Tus. It was a gentle cactus with long needles. One day he was standing in the desert, of all places , and was thinking to himself: "What am I doing here? Maybe I should go and seek riches and other wonderful things in distant lands not native to me?". The answer to the last question was simple and very eloquent: "No." The reason was that his roots were stuck in the sand and he could not move. The naked truth killed him instantly. However, the millisecond before he died, he had last thought: "I *hate* Swedish culture". This was the greatest thing any plant had ever thought. 
The end

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## Chuvak

Hmm.. I thought the sentence "Once upon a time, there was a large big cactus named (or called) Kak-Tus" is correct...   ::   (Its a pity that its wrong)!! 
Anyway, could you write another text? I need the continuation!!!   ::

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## Kirill2142

Can anyone explain me this:
One day he was standing in the desert, of all places,...  ?

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## basurero

Here's another one: 
It's was the dark and gloomy night on the beach. A storm was brewing overhead and howling was the wind through the trees. Suddenly, a man which wore a black balaclava over his head stepped out of a shadows and made his way towards group of picnicers, who were enjoying a nice snak in a sand. He creeped up to them and snached the bag where was their money. He ran off into the night, one hundred with eitie thousind dollers more rich than he were antes.

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## basurero

> Can anyone explain me this:
> One day he was standing in the desert, of all places,...  ?

 It's a kind of ironic phrase.  
Of all the places in the world it could have been, it just happened to be a desert.  
This is ironic because a desert is where you expect to find a cactus.  
Erm, I dunno how to explain it better.

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## Chuvak

> Here's another one: 
> It was a dark and gloomy night on the beach. A storm was brewing overhead and the wind was howling in the trees. Suddenly, a man who wore a black balaclava on his head had stepped out of the shadows and made his way towards a group of picnicers, who were enjoying a nice ???(snak)??? in the sand. He had crept up to them and snatched the bag where was their money. He ran off into the gloom, with one hundred eighty thousands dollars more rich than he had been before.

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## adoc

snack = small meal.

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## Chuvak

Один мужик решила ограбить банку. Так как у него не был оружия (а без оружия на банке делать нечего), то он пошел к оружейный магазин купить себе пулемет. На сожалению там осталась только старая ржавый винтовка (все пулеметы давний раскупили), и он пришлось довольствоваться ей. Платившись с продавцом, мужик пошел в домой. Дома он зарядил оружие, надел маска и пошел за банк. Придя от банк он тут же перестрелял всю охрана, заказал служащему сложить деньги в сумку и благополучно скрылась!!! Отсюда мораль: Если хочешь хочешь быть спокойный за свои деньги, не клади их больше к тот банк!!! 
Lets try it!!! Good luck!!!  ::

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## Kirill2142

> Originally Posted by Kirill2142  Can anyone explain me this:
> One day he was standing in the desert, of all places,...  ?   It's a kind of ironic phrase.  
> Of all the places in the world it could have been, it just happened to be a desert.  
> This is ironic because a desert is where you expect to find a cactus.  
> Erm, I dunno how to explain it better.

 OK I've got it! Of all places = как ни странно

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## Kirill2142

> Один мужик решила ограбить банку. Так как у него не был оружия (а без оружия на банке делать нечего), то он пошел к оружейный магазин купить себе пулемет. На сожалению там осталась только старая ржавый винтовка (все пулеметы давний раскупили), и он пришлось довольствоваться ей. Платившись с продавцом, мужик пошел в домой. Дома он зарядил оружие, надел маска и пошел за банк. Придя от банк он тут же перестрелял всю охрана, заказал служащему сложить деньги в сумку и благополучно скрылась!!! Отсюда мораль: Если хочешь хочешь быть спокойный за свои деньги, не клади их больше к тот банк!!! 
> Lets try it!!! Good luck!!!

 Чувак, у тебе вся мужики воинственный. Прикольный! Скоро они всю города разнести   ::   ::

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## Chuvak

> Чувак, у тебя все мужики воинственные. Прикольно! Скоро они все города разнесут

   ::   (Если ты русский и ошибся специально, то сорри)

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## Kirill2142

> Originally Posted by Kirill2142  Чувак, у тебя все мужики воинственные. Прикольно! Скоро они все города разнесут         (Если ты русский и ошибся специально, то сорри)

 Ай фёт ю нью эбаут ит   ::

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## Chuvak

> Originally Posted by Chuvak        Originally Posted by Kirill2142  Чувак, у тебя все мужики воинственные. Прикольно! Скоро они все города разнесут         (Если ты русский и ошибся специально, то сорри)   Ай фёт ю нью эбаут ит

 Ай диднт нью абаут ит, бат нау ай нью!!!  ::

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## Ramil

> Originally Posted by Kirill2142        Originally Posted by Chuvak        Originally Posted by Kirill2142  Чувак, у тебя все мужики воинственные. Прикольно! Скоро они все города разнесут         (Если ты русский и ошибся специально, то сорри)   Ай фёт ю нью эбаут ит     Ай диднт нью абаут ит, бат нау ай нью!!!

 Зере из э вандефул джоук абаут сач э мэннер ту райт инглиш воодс: 
Э дайлог: 
- Хау мач вотч? (How much watch?) - Который час? 
- Ту ту ту (Two two two) - 2:22 p.m. 
- Сач мач? (Such much?) - Так много? 
- Ту хум хау (To whom how) - Кому как 
- Финиш МГИМО? (Finish MGIMO) - Вы что, закончили МГИМО? 
- Ааск! (Aask) - Вы еще спрашиваете.

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## Chuvak

> - Хау мач вотч? (How much watch?) - Который час? 
> - Ту ту ту (Two two two) - 2:22 p.m. 
> - Сач мач? (Such much?) - Так много? 
> - Ту хум хау (To whom how) - Кому как 
> - Финиш МГИМО? (Finish MGIMO) - Вы что, закончили МГИМО? 
> - Ааск! (Aask) - Вы еще спрашиваете.

 Этот диалог - пример как нельзя говорить. (По моему английский здесь неправильный)

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## Kirill2142

::  Рамил, респект!

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## Ramil

> Рамиль, респект!

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## Ramil

> Этот диалог - пример как нельзя говорить. (По моему английский здесь неправильный)

 В своё время, я слышал эту шутку от выпускника МГИМО (Московский Государственный Институт Международных Отношений), который таким образом проехался по уровню подготовки своих собратьев-студентов. 
Сама шутка весьма старая, с рубежа 1970-80 гг. 
Еще до кучи:
Новый русский за границей в гостинице звонит в ресторан и заказывает: 
Плиз, ту тиc ту ту ту (two teas to two-two - два чая в двадцать второй номер)  ::

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## Gordon Freeman

Чувак, ты как, шутки понимаешь?

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## kalinka_vinnie

ту ту ту - two to two - 1:58   ::

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## Chuvak

> Чувак, ты как, шутки понимаешь?

 С английским шутки плохи   ::

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## Chuvak

Basurero!!!! 
Я исправил твой текст!!! Пожалуйста, проверь мои исправления!!!
(И попытайся исправить мой текст (тот что на русском!!!))

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## ReDSanchous

> It's was a dark gloomy night on _the_ beach. A storm was brewing overhead and wind was howling through the trees. Suddenly, a man who wore a black balaclava _on_ his head stepped out of the shadows and made his way towards a group of the picknicers, who _was/wer_e enjoying a nice snack inthe sand. He creeped up on them and snatched the bag where  their money was. He ran off into the night, one hundred eighy thousand dollars  richer than he was  before.

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## adoc

let me, let me try   ::   
Here is my attempt at the infamous a's and the's 
It was a dark gloomy night on the beach. A storm was brewing overhead and the wind was howling through the trees. Suddenly, a man who wore a black balaclava on his head stepped out of shadows and made his way towards a group of picnickers, who were enjoying a nice snack on the sand. He creeped up on them and snatched the bag with their money. He ran off into the night, one hundred eighty thousand dollars richer than he was before.

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## kalinka_vinnie

> let me, let me try    
> Here is my attempt at the infamous a's and the's 
> It was a dark, gloomy night on the beach. A storm was brewing overhead and the wind was howling through the trees. Suddenly, a man who wore a black balaclava on his head stepped out of the shadows and made his way towards a group of picnickers, who were enjoying a nice snack on the sand. He creeped up on them and snatched the bag with their money. He ran off into the night, one hundred eighty thousand dollars richer than he was before.

 You missed one! Otherwise, molodets!

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## adoc

That was the place I had most doubts with. I've heard "stepping out of shadows" as an expression, but then the night was gloomy and I wanted to put a "the" there intuitively but then decided not to   ::  
Gawd that's the most difficult part of English, isnt it? 
(Note to myself, follow the intuition more often, like normal people do)

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## kalinka_vinnie

Yeah, stepping out of shadows in a dark night is a pretty good accomplishment!   ::   
yeah, I guess "the", "a" and the lack of them is probably the most difficult. That, and guessing pronounciation/spelling of new words  ::

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## basurero

Chuvak: 
It was a dark and gloomy night on the beach. A storm was brewing overhead and the wind was howling in the trees. Suddenly, a man who wore/wearing a black balaclava on his head stepped out of the shadows and made his way towards a group of picnickers, who were enjoying a nice ???(snack)??? on the sand. He crept up to them and snatched the bag where their money was. He ran off into the gloom, one hundred and eighty thousands dollars richer than before.

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## basurero

RedSanchous: 
It's was a dark gloomy night on the beach. A storm was brewing overhead and the wind was howling through the trees. Suddenly, a man who wore/wearing a black balaclava on his head stepped out of the shadows and made his way towards a group of picknicers, who were enjoying a nice snack in the sand. He creeped up on them and snatched the bag where their money was. He ran off into the night, one hundred and eighy thousand dollars richer than he was before.

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## Chuvak

> Yeah, stepping out of shadows in a dark night is a pretty good accomplishment!    
> yeah, I guess "the", "a" and the lack of them is probably the most difficult. That, and guessing pronounciation/spelling of new words

 Самая сложная часть это правильно подобрать перевод слова в предложении, чтобы предложение нормально звучало (не все словосочетания возможны). Например, local можно перевести как локальный, местный. Однако, словосочетание local train нельзя перевести как "локальный поезд" или "местный поезд"!!!

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## Chuvak

He ran off into the night, one hundred and eighy thousand dollars richer than he had been before. (Why I cannot use "Past Perfect"??? here)  ::   
Anyway, Basurero, I'm waiting for another story!!!  ::

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## basurero

Можно использовать это грамматическое время но не звучит.  
Следующая история через несколько минут.......   ::

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## basurero

Well, now that man had stolen a fairly large sum of cash, he had been faced with the new dilemmna. What should he spend it in? First he thought he would spend it for a bandly new convertionable car, but then he had thought twice, and he resoluted to save it for his retirement. So off he when to bank where planned to create the new account in which to statch his cash. Unfortunately, the bank happened to be closed so he has had to return on the different day.

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## Chuvak

> Well, now that man had stolen a fairly large sum of cash, he had been faced with the new dilemmna. What should he spend it in? First he thought he would spend it for a bandly new convertionable car, but then he had thought twice, and he resoluted to save it for his retirement. So off he when to bank where planned to create the new account in which to statch his cash. Unfortunately, the bank happened to be closed so he has had to return on the different day.

 Well, after stealing a fairly large sum of money he faced with a new dilemma: what should he spend it on (or for). First he thought he could spend it for (or on) a badly new ??conversionable?? car, but then he had thought twice and resoluted to safe (spare) it for his retirement. So off he went to the bank where he planned to create a new account on which to put his cash. Unfortunately, the bank happened to be closed, so he had to return another day.

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## basurero

Your version:   

> Well, after stealing a fairly large sum of money he was faced with a new dilemma: what should he spend it on. First he thought he could spend it for (or on) a brand new convertible car, but then he thought twice and resolved to save (spare) it for his retirement. So off he went to the bank where he planned to create a new account in which to put his cash. Unfortunately, the bank happened to be closed, so he had to return another day.

 Ideal version: 
Well, now that man had stolen a fairly large sum of cash, he was faced with a new dilemmna. What should he spend it on? First he thought he would spend it on a brand new convertible car, but then he thought twice, and resolved to save it for his retirement. So off he when to the bank where he planned to create a new account in which to stash his cash. Unfortunately, the bank happened to be closed so hehad to return on a different day.

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## ReDSanchous

> RedSanchous: 
> It's was a dark gloomy night on the beach. A storm was brewing overhead and the wind was howling through the trees. Suddenly, a man who wore/wearing a black balaclava on his head stepped out of the shadows and made his way towards a group of picknicers, who were enjoying a nice snack in the sand. He creeped up on them and snatched the bag where their money was. He ran off into the night, one hundred and eighy thousand dollars richer than he was before.

 Sorry for the late comment. 
one hundred and eighty - I think it's the British way of saying numbers.  In AmE they don't say 'and'  after "hundred". At least, my English dictionary says so ^)

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