Stanley Miller experiment

Hi! I've written a little essay, please check for grammar and stylistic mistakes. And please point out if you are native speaker or not :) Thanks in advance

According to the reading passage the tremendous steps towards discovering the origin and conditions of life birth on the Earth was made by the research team consisted of professor Harold Urey and his student Stanley Miller. The have made one of the most prominent experiments that emulated the conditions under which the earth life believed to be originated. Researches were able to make inference about the first organic structures by observing the results of experiment: after the substance was evaporated and exposed to series of electrical impulses the final mixture contained amino acids. This experiment can be named as a starting point for future research.
However, the lecture casts doubt on the opinion presented in the reading passage.
To lecturer's mind, current view is suspicious about the experiment. First of all, the environment in the young Earth hasn't been exposed to continuous electrical charges, as it were in the case of Miller's experiment. Secondly, as the narrator claims, the Miller's atmosphere hasn't sufficient amount of oxygen. Thirdly, amino acids were found on the asteroids, consequently they could be on the Earth, when it was at the beginning of its formation.
The lecture dispute information presented in the reading passage and claims that experiment isn't able to fully explain the origin of life.

This is what it might look like if I were to write the essay. :wink: There’s a ground for further corrections if anyone cares to join the thread. :flazhok:

According to the reading passage great steps towards discovering the origin of life on Earth and conditions at which it occurred were made by a research team of professor Harold Urey and his student Stanley Miller. They conducted one of the most prominent experiments ever, emulating the conditions under which life on Earth is believed to have originated. The researchers were able to make assumptions as to what the very first organic structures were by analyzing the results of their experiment, which revealed that after the substance had been evaporated and exposed to a series of electric discharges the resulting mixture contained amino acids. The experiment may prove to be a starting point for future research.
However, the lecturer casts doubt on the opinion presented in the reading passage.
The lecturer thinks that from today’s perspective there maybe some suspicions concerning the purity of the experiment. First of all, the environment of the early Earth wasn’t subjected to continual electrical discharges, as was the case in Miller's experiment. Secondly, as the narrator claims, the Miller's atmosphere had no sufficient amount of oxygen. Thirdly, amino acids happened to have been found on asteroids, consequently they could have been present on Earth in the earlier stages of its formation.
The lecture disputes information presented in the reading passage and claims that experiment wasn’t able to fully explain the origin of life.

We have to assume though that the audience your essay is addressed to is familiar with the subject matter. Otherwise it’s absolutely incomprehensible.

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Originally Posted by alexB

According to the reading passage, great steps towards discovering the origin of life on Earth and the conditions [s:148s38kv]at[/s:148s38kv] under which it occurred were made by a research team of professor Harold Urey and his student Stanley Miller. They conducted one of the most prominent experiments ever, emulating the conditions under which life on Earth is believed to have originated. The researchers were able to make assumptions as to what the very first organic structures were by analyzing the results of their experiment, which revealed that after the substance had been evaporated and exposed to a series of electric discharges the resulting mixture contained amino acids. The experiment may prove to be a starting point for future research.(Alternative reading: the experiment can be seen as having laid the foundations for all subsequent research.)
However, the lecturer casts doubt on the opinion presented in the reading passage.
The lecturer thinks that from today’s perspective there may__be some grounds for suspicion concerning the purity(probably better: validity) of the experiment. First of all, the environment of the early Earth wasn’t subjected to continual electrical discharges, as was the case in Miller's experiment. Secondly, [s:148s38kv]as[/s:148s38kv] the narrator claims that [s:148s38kv]the[/s:148s38kv] Miller's atmosphere had no sufficient did not have a sufficient/contained an insufficient amount of oxygen. Thirdly, amino acids [s:148s38kv]happened to[/s:148s38kv] have been found on asteroids and, consequently, could have been present on the Earth in the earlier stages of its formation.
The lecture disputes information presented in the reading passage and claims that the experiment [s:148s38kv]wasn’t[/s:148s38kv] isn't(the lecturer is arguing from today's perspective) able to fully explain the origin of life.

We have to assume though that the audience your essay is addressed to is familiar with the subject matter. Otherwise it’s absolutely incomprehensible.

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Well done Hazamov! :good: This is pretty good by now:

"According to the reading passage" does not sound right to me. I understand roughly what you mean, but it does not sound like native English, at least to me.* I am not sure where the text comes from, so I can not suggest a good alternative.

"According to the hypothesis put forward in the presentation", "According to Professor Smith's article", "according to Dr Jones' dissertation", "according to the theories outlined in chapter 1" might be the sort of thing you want... Perhaps someone can suggest something better?

And don't worry about perfection in English for academic papers. As long as you have no obvious grammatical errors or spelling mistakes it's OK. All across Western (continental) Europe, as well as Asia, people are forced to write academic papers in English due to various policies and their own aspirations to get their material published... Quite often, their written English sounds very "un-native" even though it's fully comprehensible.. Some of it is frankly pretty bad English. So if some grammatical error slips in, you are in very good company and there is no need to feel bad about it... It is commendable that you seek help to get this proofread...

*I am Swedish but my English is at a native level and I live in Britain.

A reading passage must be a passage from a textbook, some kind of a test, like a reading comprehension in a TOEFL test. :instruct: :wink:

In this context it looks like the line "According to the reading passage" is a direct response to someone asking for an explanation of a previously read article.A comprehension test as alexB says.

'According to the passage' fits better if the question posed was something along the lines of "Explain the series of events in the above passage"

All of Johanna's examples are better though if they fit the source material.

alexB is right, it is response to the Writing task of TOEFL. The task requires to explain main points in the reading passage, and show how the lecture casts doubt on it. Thank you all !

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Originally Posted by hazamov

alexB is right, it is response to the Writing task of TOEFL. The task requires to explain main points in the reading passage, and show how the lecture casts doubt on it. Thank you all !

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Hazamov,

Just a few examples of what i would write:

alexB is right.The essay was my response to a question posed in a writing task in TOEFL.
alexB is right.My essay was responding to a question posed in a writing task in TOEFL.

If the question posed was :

This task requires you to explain the main points in the passage and show how the lecture casts doubt upon it.

You could answer with :

[The/This] task required [me] to explain [the] main points in the [passage] and show how the lecture cast doubt upon it.


I'm not sure what TOEFL is but i hope that helps mate.