Thread: Бутерброд

Привет, форумы. This is another one of my attempts at a translation. I found this one particularly difficult however, and know that I probably made many mistakes. If you could help fix up my translation, that would be great.

Сказка Бутерброд Читать
Как у наших ворот
За горою
Жил да был бутерброд
С ветчиною.
Захотелось ему
Прогуляться,
На траве-мураве
Поваляться.
И сманил он с собой
На прогулку
Краснощёкую сдобную
Булку.
Но чайные чашки в печали,
Стуча и бренча, закричали:
«Бутерброд,
Сумасброд,
Не ходи из ворот,
А пойдёшь -
Пропадёшь,
Муре в рот попадёшь!
Муре в рот,
Муре в рот,
Муре в рот
Попадёшь!»

Read the Tale of the Sandwich
How our gates
Over the mountain
Once lived a sandwich
With ham.

He wants
To go for a walk,
On grass-ants
To fall

And to lure him to himself
On an outing
rosy-cheeked butter
roll

But tea cup in sadness,
knocking and jingling, cries out:
“Sandwich,
Unorthodox,
Don’t go out of the gate,
But go –
More in my mouth enter!
More in my mouth,
More in my mouth,
More in my mouth
enter!”

У ворот = by the gates

Мура = a typical traditional cat's name (Мурка).
Quite stereotypical, like Fluffy or Mittens.

Не ходи... = don't go there
Муре в рот попадешь = You'll end up in Fluffy's mouth.

Also, "привет форумы" means "Hi boards". Форум is a place/site where we all gather, we are "форумчане"

У ворот = by the gates

How does "Как у наших ворот" differ from "У ворот"? How would it be translated?

Как is an old-fashioned poetical device, it doesn't really mean anything. Just say "once upon a time".

Как (-*-) у (by/near) наших (our) ворот (gate)

P.S. For the sake of rhythm you can double the У (как у наших у ворот, за горою).
It rhymes with "You can fly so very high, little birdy" by pitch and tempo.

Сказка Бутерброд Читать

Read the Tale of the Sandwich

I think this line doesn't belong to the tale. The Russian insn't even grammaticaly correct, it's typical internet tag for search engines.

So should it look something like this?

By our gates
Over the mountain
Once lived a sandwich
With ham.
He wants
To go for a walk,
On grass-ants
To fall
And to lure him to himself
On an outing
rosy-cheeked butter
roll
But tea cup in sadness,
knocking and jingling, cries out:
“Sandwich,
Unorthodox,
Don’t go out of the gate,
But go –
You’ll end up in Fluffy’s mouth!
Fluffy’s mouth,
Fluffy’s mouth,
Fluffy’s mouth
You’ll end up in!”