Hello & Is This A Love Story?
Well here goes. Hi all. I am Steve and this is my first post.
So for starters I should fess up, that I haven't just come here to be sociable (although I will) and learn about Russian culture and language. I don't mind if I do some learning about this and get some basic Russian language skills, but I do confess I have a premeditated agenda.
About a month ago, I was browsing in an internet classified advertising website, in the personals section to be specific. Well if some nice girl described me to a tee, maybe I would line up a date (OK so now you know i am single - settle down ladies ;) ). i I couldn't see anybody whose rave really struck a chord with me, so I decided to just pick a girl who looked pretty and put all of my chips on a long shot. I wasn't really too serious.
With a name like Tatyana I might have known the girl was Russian, but hey, there are single Russian girls here in Australia (I think). I was browsing in a website that is supposed to be intended for local content, but I think that is strictly left to the honor system. Anyhow, I emailed Tatyana and she replied. It turns out that she lives in Kazan Russia. She appears to be a stereotype of the lonely Russian girl, who wants to marry and have children outside of her homeland. She had a boyfriend who cheated on her (that bastard), and she has sworn off of her countrymen.
I must admit, I have become rather fascinated and perhaps a bit infatuated with this girl. She swore point blank from her first email, that she was not writing to ask me for any money or to scam me in anyway. She just wants to meet a man in the western world, who will respect her and treat her right. So I have tried my best to take her on her word and accept that what she has told me is the truth.
We have exchanged about eight emails each now, and I am finding it hard. I don't want to go into too much detail about what she has said, as I feel as if I might be betraying her confidence. Her English skills are not to bad. I can generally understand what she is saying quite easily. I'm not sure that this works the other way though. Despite her enthusiasm to ramp up the romantic rhetoric (perhaps very sincere for her part), she doesn't seem to be hearing or understand some of the things I am telling her. I am concerned that, if we are to try to get to know each other via email, well enough for it to be worthwhile planning to meet each other, she will have to know me a bit (well.. a lot really) better.
A couple of tell tale signs concern me though. For starters, she has not responded to quite a few questions I have directly asked, and her emails all appear to indicate that she is either not reading or understanding what I have written. In some cases, subjects dear to me I have expressed in detail, and she has asked a question as if I had never said a word about the subject. I want to explain specifics but i can't.
It has been mentioned that she has no mobile phone, no phone at home and no internet (of course). She is limited to visiting an internet cafe, where she can email from but can't visit websites. She has never (true to her word) asked me for any money to help, even with the things which might make our communications much easier.
I am so very conflicted and perplexed right now about what to do with this girl. On one hand, she may be working at some email mill, where they crank out romantic platitudes to men who would feel obliged to help and send money to the stunningly beautiful woman who can't afford her own phone, computer and internet connection. She could be emailing ten guys a day for all I know. On the other hand, she may be perfectly honest and not responding to my specific questions and subject matter, because she doesn't understand very well what I am trying to say. In which case I need help.
In my last post to Tatyana, I decided to confront the issue head on. My attempt assumed she could understand what I was saying. I told her that I was concerned about some things I had talked about, which she had raised as if I had never said anything about them. I asked her to read my emails again, and ask for explanations if she doesn't understand what I have said. In the same email, I broke the news that I had lost my job (which I have). I was laid off last week, so I am no longer even a wage earner. Up until my last post, we had worked up to daily emails, but it had been five days since then that I had not heard from her and I began to suspect that she either realized that I would not fall for a scam, or perhaps I was not worth bothering with because I no longer have a wage.
Either way I had begun to wash my hands, when today, I received another email from Tatyana which failed to acknowledge my concerns and pretended that we were becoming so close and serious. She told me she had told her closest friend about me and asked me who I have told and well... She just seems so enthusiastic that we have found each other, and I don't want to break her heart (or lose her), if she is for real. On the other hand she just doesn't seem to be getting to know me at all and goes on pretending that we are having this whirlwind, online romance, where as I have emphasized patience and gradual trust.
So... My problem is this: Is it really just a language barrier problem? If so what can I do? Are there really so many girls like this in Russia, or is it just an exaggerated stereotype? If so who is doing the exaggerating? Would anybody here care to set me on the right path? For this I would be most grateful. I have wondered if somebody could translate my last post into Russian, then Tatyana would have to understand it.
Do you think that there is romance here or... I don't want to think Tatyana is scamming me, Please tell me it isn't likely and she is a good girl with her heart in the right place and she just doesn't understand me so well. If somebody would like to volunteer to translate an email I would be very grateful. I would allow a trusted person to read our emails so far and give a considered opinion. Anybody with bi-lingual Russian/English reading writing skills, with an interest in relationships?
Would you please help?
Skepticus.
